Wednesday, 13th December, 2017

Putin assuaged young Barron

25, Jan 2017 By ysoserious

In a late night phone call to Barron Trump Russian president Mr. Putin has extended his help to keep the social media trolls at bay. Kremlin sources revealed, “The President was miffed by the issue of young Trump being petrified and hounded by trolls”. Putin has requisitioned help of Russian hackers, to be kept at Barron Trump’s disposal, whenever Barron goes active on social media. Russian hackers will give trolls a befitting reply on behalf of Barron. Moreover, a new 24-by-7 hotline number with direct access to Putin’s office has been established, in case Barron feels the need.

Meanwhile, in a related development Edward Snowden has agreed to give young Trump lessons on how to use social media as it is a highly dubious place. He said, “My experience to avoid getting detected while I was sniffing data of USA covert agencies will come handy. I will help young Trump, who is still coming to terms with the shocking event, to tide over the tough time.”

Facebook sources on this issue said, “We are putting in place a new panic button on Barron Trump’s Facebook page. It can be accessed by him if he feels threatened while using Facebook. A quick reaction team under Mark will come to his rescue.” Meanwhile, Donald Trump has advised Barron Trump not to worry as his father will build great walls around all social media platforms, which can be accessed only by Trump supporters using special IDs. If Oval office sources are to be believed,” There may be an increase in corporate tax rate for those who allow such incidence of trolling on their platforms.”