Sunday, 23rd July, 2017

ISIS Leader Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi celebrates 100th Time Media has declared him as dead

24, Jun 2017 By electroman

ISIS leader Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi has announced a mass celebration across their territory in Iraq and Syria to commemorate the 100th time he was declared dead by the news media. This news has come to us as a surprise claimed a journalist. We used to report twice a week that he was killed by US bombing. We knew he was laughing at us every time he saw the news, but we were not aware that he was keeping count.

Celebration going on
Celebration going on

When we asked Abu Bakr Al-Baghdadi about how he managed to escape, he gave some secrets for his success. He also wanted us to call him by a shorter name. We suggested ABAB. He refused and asked us to call him BABA, since Arabic is written from Right to left. So BABA told us that he used to dress up like women while fleeing from the authorities. Which reminded us of yet another baba who uses the same tactics for fleeing and is as rich as the ISIS leader.

BABA also compared US military to Bollywood villains who can’t even shoot the hero with a AK47 in broad daylight. We asked him what is the thing he fears the most. He told us that there is Fascism on the rise in the world which will overtake them as the most evil force on earth.

BABA will be live on Facebook cutting a human head shaped cake. Also he will be distributing free suicide bomb vests to kids in the neighborhood.