Monday, 23rd October, 2017

ISI, ISIS in talks to form new Islamic super-state, to be named "PafghIStan"

26, Jul 2015 By yetAnotherGhati

Even as it recently played hosts to delegations from the Taliban and the Afghan government to broker a peace between the two parties, a highly-placed source in the Pakistani Inter Service Intelligence has revealed that the ISI has been conducting secret talks with representatives of ISIS towards the formation of PafghIStan, a new Islamic super-state.

The source, who for obvious reasons refused to be named, admitted in a telephonic interview: “the two organizations have great mutual respect for each other, specifically in the similarities between their respective modi operandi and since the stated goals of both is to create a home for Islam, it was bound to be only a matter of time before the two made common cause and started to work towards harmonizing efforts to achieve their shared goal.”

Top authorities discussing and explaining details of the new state
Top authorities discussing and explaining details of the new state

Emboldened by recent advances in what were previously Taliban-held territories in the east of Afghanistan, the IS is said to be confident of being able to overrun the entire nation within the year. Should the IS succeed in implementing their takeover of Afghanistan, the potential new state would be roughly congruent with the present day Pakistan, Afghanistan and ISIS-held territories in Iraq and Syria.

While the talks seem to be moving mostly in a positive direction, numerous concerns remain on both sides. Made wary by their own experiences in erstwhile East Pakistan, the ISI is skeptical of the feasibility of effectively administering what would be a geographically discontiguous state should it be formed.

ISIS however does not perceive this to be a challenge, having offered the American state of Alaska as an example of how such administration could be effectively affected. For its part, ISIS is learnt to have raised concerns over the ISI’s unholy obsession with India and the Kashmir issue, preferring instead to first focus on launching a two-front attack on Iran in order to capture the nation’s nuclear capabilities, augment Pakistan’s and greatly consolidating those of the new state.

One sticky issue that remains to be resolved between the two parties is the proposed name for the new entity. PafghIStan, a portmanteau of Pakistan, Afghanistan and IS is the name preferred by the ISI, while ISIS is said to prefer ISISAP. As per the unnamed source: “while we admit that PafghIStan might be a mouthful, we nonetheless strongly feel that it is better than haphazardly adding letters to an increasingly unwieldy acronym each time new lands are conquered.”