Pakistan High Commissioner, Mr. Abdul Basit, learned a lesson or two yesterday on deciding one’s guest list wisely. The occasion was celebration of Pakistan Day in the high commission. The ball room of the embassy was glimmering with shining Kalashnikovs and AK-47s that had been kept in every corner. Hand grenades, anti-tank mines and bazookas served as floral decorations on each table. A special 10 Kg cake, designed to look like an N bomb was to be cut as a part of the celebration.
The who’s who of Lashkar e Taiyyaba, Jaish e Muhammad, Harkat ul Mujahiddeen and Taliban rubbed shoulders with aging Hurriyat representatives, Mani Shankar Aiyer, other senile Indian politicians and Human rights NGOs. Journalists also noted the presence of some ISIS representatives in the shadows. In this list of high and mighty, Mr Basit, in his wisdom chose to invite Mr V K Singh, ex-army chief and present minister of state for external affairs.
And that is when things took a turn for the worse. A small togethering of the terrorists, disorientated separatists and India-haters would have ended with a couple of Pakistan Zindabad and Death to India slogans. However, Mr Singh could not control his temper at what he saw were the enemies of his nation, wining and dining and singing odes to the glory of his motherland’s arch enemy. He was torn asunder between his disgust at having to attend such an anti-national celebration and his duty for the chair. He tried to control his emotions and behave pleasantly, but eventually the veil slipped.
What happened next is known to all, Mr Singh, rushed outside, pulled out a hand pump that had recently been installed in the garden of the embassy and ran inside, swinging it wildly. All the Kalashnikovs and AK 47s couldn’t stop Mr Singh as he hit one terrorist after other with his personal weapon of mass destruction. By this time, Mr Basit and his friends had taken refuge under a table. Mr. Singh then climbed the stage, tore down the Pakistani flag and with a booming voice declared “Abdul Basit, tumhare Pakistan Zindabad se humein koi aitraaz nahi hai, lekin hamara Hindustan Zindabad tha, Zindabad hai aur Zindabad rahega”. Then, in a Sunny Deol-esque fashion, Mr. Singh then hoisted Mrs. Basit on to his shoulders and said “Chalo Sakina, Hindustan laut chalein”, before realizing that this was Mrs. Basit and not Sakina.
Mr. Singh abruptly realized the inappropriateness of his behaviour and hastily exited the venue, leaving behind dozens of injured and wounded Pakistan sympathizers. As soon as he got into his car, he tweeted, “#DUTY the force that binds one morally or legally to one’s obligations, #DISGUST To sicken or fill with loathing”.