American President Donald Trump has performed a miracle to save the environment. He gave a greencard to Modi. He said it cuts down the wastage of aircraft fuel by Narendra Modi in his monthly trips to America. This is a win-win for everyone in the world, and particularly for citizens of India. Residents of Hindustan town in Indiana state (zip code 47408) celebrated this historic event and offered a free condo to the proud new greencard holder.
Senior BJP leader Subramaniam Swamy said he has written to Trump. He released the letter “Dear Trump, I am a former CIA asset. I urge you to take Arun Jaitley along with Modi. I want to see Jaitley kicking and screaming to a place where he can’t go mad further and raise taxes. If possible lock him up in San Luis Obispo prison!”
Arun Jaitley told PTI “Right now I have two ministries under my armpit. With Modi out I can get the remaining 40 ministries and become a full blown Czar! China supports me!”
Shiv Sena agreed with Trump. It pointed out that Modi has visited US more times than his own constituency of Banaras.
Senior Congress leader Rahul Gandhi was nonplussed by this event. His spokesman said “Rahul has greencards in Italy, Thailand, UK, USA and Monaco! So there is nothing bigly about this”.
Leaders of AIADMK party in TamilNadu passed a resolution in the first day of the assembly session demanding that all the MLAs be given greencards by America. They wrote “we are all going to lose our seats in the upcoming elections, therefore we need a place to go and hide”. Senior AIADMK MLA Mr.Mariappan Kennedy told our reporter “As a christian I know Jayalalithaa is the 11th Avatar of Lord Vishnu. Hence, the first greencard should be given to her”.
Pakistani PM Nawaz Sharif demanded “We have a Lahore in Virginia (zip code 22960). Hence Trump should give me a greencard. So far America has been giving me and my fellow terrorists only B1/B2 visas”.
Beef and pork belly stocks crashed in US stock markets today, out of fear that cow vigilantes might expand their criminal operations to Montana, Wisconsin and North Dakota.
PM Modi declared this a huge victory and attributed this success to demonetization. He proudly announced he will force Trump to replace all greencards by Aadhaar cards and surrender constitutionally protected inalienable birth rights to the State Surveillance machine.