Saturday, 24th February, 2018

Cambridge University reports 30% drop in applications after Rahul's interview

29, Jan 2014 By Harshad Karandikar

In an unforeseen development, the Cambridge University Admissions department reported a 30% drop in applications for its MPhil programmes after India’s PM-in-waiting, Rahul Gandhi appeared on the Arnab Goswami show.

Rahul Gandhi
Cambridge educated leader

Speaking to Faking News, Dr. James Didyagetin, Chairperson, Admissions for the University of Cambridge stated that immediately after the program aired, he received thousands of emails from applicants requesting that their application for admission into the prestigious university be considered withdrawn.

Earlier in the day, Mr. Gandhi appeared on the show and surprised viewers with a stunning display of coherence and clarity, practically lifting the veil on what many had assumed to be a steady, well-organized, secret strategy to ensure what is predicted to be one of the biggest defeats ever for the grand old party of Indian politics.

After criticizing Mr. Goswami for not offering him the opportunity to talk specifics, Mr. Gandhi clearly laid out his stance and views on key issues which had taken over the political spectrum over the last year, requesting Mr. Goswami to switch to a Yes/No mode for all questions. Mr. Gandhi also clarified that he wanted to rest all speculation about the fact that he had completed his MPhil from the University.

Mr. Saurabh Verma (name changed to avoid affecting his chances of securing an admission in other prestigious institutions), an erstwhile aspirant to the University, admitted that he had indeed withdrawn his application for the MPhil programme after the interview aired.

A crestfallen Mr. Verma stated that after viewing the interview, he had done an honest introspection of his own capabilities and realized that he did not have it in him to make the cut.

“Mr. Gandhi is a class apart. His visionary ideas will undoubtedly change Indian politics. As an applicant who stands by every word written in my Statement of Purpose, I cannot truly continue to claim that I am amongst the best of the best, and good enough to be considered for entry into the hallowed portals of Cambridge.”

Dr. Didyagetin admitted that the sentiment was shared by a significant proportion of the applicants, who wished to refocus their admission strategy onto Universities for which they stood a better chance. One applicant even ended his email with the statement “Who would like to known as a reject from a University from which Rahulbaba graduated?”