Wednesday, 20th September, 2017

iPhones to go through ‘Saw’ experiments to prove its worth

29, Sep 2014 By johnrj

After the infamous news about iPhone 6’s bending problem, their manufacturers have promptly sent them to the brains behind the ‘Saw’ movie series for more strenuous stress tests and wild experiments.

“We have received many recommendations to use iPhone 6 for many of our experiments,” said a scientist who was pouring sulphuric acid over a brand new iphone6, “Apart from apple, mainly it’s from android users who want to prove how bad iPhones are.”

iPhone 6
iPhone 6

Many apple marketing heads have been under fire after the infamous bending problem which has caused so much controversy throughout the tech world that they have provided nearly unlimited budget to try anything and prove that the iPhone 6 would soon be revamped to be something spectacular. They were instantly reminded about the tortures of humans in the Saw movie series and they had sent forward thousands of iPhones to be used with the same methods.

“iPhones are bought by more android users to prove that it’s worthless than by iPhone lovers themselves,” said a marketing head of apple. “We are thankful for their sincere scepticism but with these Saw experiments, we will prove them wrong. Anyways iPhones are almost like living things so ‘Saw’ ways of torturing would prove good.”

“We have always tried these experiments on Nokia 1100 phones but now due to the manufacturers wanting to prove their claim about iPhones, it gives us a perfect change,” said another scientist.

As per the reports from the lab, iPhones have been so far soaked in cow urine for 7 hours to check liquid immunity, tied at the end of Rajdhani express for the whole trip to try durability and introduced to jolts of electricity for continuous 10 hour duration to check its resistance towards it. More experiments are suggested by various android users on a daily basis.

“We even had a sponsor long back to send an iPhone to mars via Mangalyaan to prove that its battery power wouldn’t last long before it even crosses the earth’s orbit but iPhone 6 released much later unfortunately,” said another marketing head.

Currently android users are devising more plans to prove the worthlessness of the iPhone and have initiated cult gatherings to discuss the same. If rumors are to be believed, a hole has been dug towards the center of the earth to drop an iPhone to prove its reception problems and publish the findings on the Internet. More news to follow about the status of these experiments soon.

Topics:#iPhone #Movies