The first Test of the Tendulkar Farewell Series lasted for less than three days, disappointing the average cricket fan.
Tendulkar made a fluent ten in the first innings was robbed off a second chance to bat by the West Indies who seemed to be in a hurry to dive into the hotel swimming pool.
Despite Mamata Banerjee’s repeated threats of withdrawing support to the ruling government, West Indies were unable to drag the test into the weekend. A group of cricket enthusiasts led by none other than Guru Meiyappan himself, protested outside the Eden Gardens.
The mob demanded an explanation as to why such a weak team like the West Indies was invited to participate in such an important series. Why even the Ranji Game at Lahili provided the Little Master a second opportunity to score and end it in style! In an exclusive chat with the Faking Times, a BCCI official on the condition of anonymity made a few startling revelations.
“SriLanka was the team of choice,but there was a concern that the Lankans would spoil the party,” he said disapprovingly.
The official was visibly upset.
“Arre bhai, who made you a sports reporter? Don’t you remember how the Lankans deliberately bowled a wide to Sehwag, leaving him stranded on 99? What if they kept bowling wides and no balls to the openers, so that Sachin could not bat at all?” the officer demanded sounding rather irritated.
But our nosey reporter was going to rake up some other issues.
Well, why not South Africa? How about forgetting petty Lorgat politics and rising up to the occasion. At least the matches would have been competitive. Hell, the Proteas would have lasted longer than 3 days!
The official shook his head in dismay. “But we weren’t sure if our boys would have….” his words tailed off.
But imagine Tendulkar vs Steyn!
“Steyn and Morkel… He rather undergo a proctological exam rather than face those sadists.” the official lamented.
Well, atleast he would have got a chance to bat twice in each test. This West Indies team have robbed him off that opportunity.
“But he could bowl in both innings!” the official exclaimed.
Apparently, the man himself.
“He is unfazed by the score of 10 that he got yesterday. What upset him was why he couldn’t get the ball to turn like Shillingford. He has been selected as a spinner who can bat a bit,” the official asserted.
“Tendulkar wants to retire with 50 test wickets. He needs 4 more to get there,” he added, referring to a little note pad.
And what if he didn’t get any more wickets in this series?
“Well, the pitches in South Africa will offer assistance to spinners….”
Our reporter fainted.