Monday, 23rd October, 2017

Suarez attracting lot of Hollywood attention after today's Oscar winning performance against Italy

26, Jun 2014 By sarcastic4ever

Hollywood, CA. Luis Suarez a famous diver turned biter who acts for Uruguay and Liverpool FC today gave his best acting performance on the world stage.

The shot unfolded this way; he bit an Italian player but behaved as if he was punched on his protruding teeth. Sources say this was done on purpose to showcase his skills to impress famous directors like Steven Spielberg, Christopher Nolan , Sajid Khan and Ram Gopal Verma who were in the stands to witness his acting after he was recommend by a lot of big names in the industry.

Reports coming out of suggest that there are few remakes in place with Suarez as their lead actor. Director of Marley & Me was amazed and was of full appreciation for now the household name, he was excited and exclaimed, “I was looking for a perfect dog to make a sequel of Marley & Me and now I have identified it”. Steven Spielberg is going to hand Suarez a mega million dollar deal to act as a dinosaur for his next Jurassic Park movie, he astonishingly enunciated his feelings, “I had only heard of him before but watching him made me realize that I had overlooked such a star for such a long time. I cannot think of any other living being to act as a dinosaur for my movie. His scary face and razor sharp teeth fits absolutely fits into the character”. Ram Gopal Verma a famous Bollywood director has already made his script for his next scary movie and is looking to finalize the small details before unveiling Suarez as the lead ghost. The music industry is not far away as well with rumors flying out that Baha men are coming out of a remake of ‘Who  Let the Dogs out’ with Suarez in the video.

His journey to stardom was not an easy one. He started as an unknown actor in Uruguay and moved his way up to Europe. It was in Holland where he made his big breakthrough. On the football pitch he tried to enact what Mike Tyson had done several years ago i.e. bite an opponent’s ear. His performance was so immaculate that it won him 5 games of paid rest and world popularity. Five years fast forward and he executed a scene from the movie shark; he acted as a human cannibal and tried to eat an opponent. Directors were so impressed from his feat that they made him miss the rest of the season and handed him free  acting lessons. This did not gave him the break he wanted but he continued to keep people openmouthed with his great performances throughout the next two years. With everyone expecting him to make a big impression at the world stage this was his time to shine and rest is history

When our reports asked Liverpool fans how they are feeling about this, Rohit explained “People who think that it was a foul play they are absolutely wrong. He enjoys to give love bites every now and then as he is preparing for a romantic stint in Karan Johar’s films”. Hugo Almeda was excited and admitted, “He is the best, I love him and Suarez’s teeth”, who was on his way to perform a surgery on his teeth to make them look as Suarez. Our correspondent in Brazil when interrogated Gerrard if Suarez told him that he will be acting in hollywood after England’s loss to Uruguay, “That’s none of your business”, he answered with a straight face.

All is not positive around this theatrics with some status updates like “All men are Suarez”, “If you have a dog don’t name it Suarez” and ” Suarez completes his 3-course meal with a Pasta Chiellini” floating all over social media