Monday, 23rd April, 2018

MS Dhoni bats for inclusive growth of world cricket

19, Feb 2014 By Amol Khanolkar

On Tuesday evening, one of our Faking News(FN) reporter spotted  MSD in a pub (Apparently same pub where Ryder was punched). Speaking exclusively with FN reporter MS Dhoni expressed sense of accomplishment and demanded better respect for his team mates. Here is the transcript:

MS Dhoni
Storm of thoughts.

Reporter: What is your reaction to India’s miserable performance in New Zealand? It has been long since we have won overseas.

MSD (taking a sip of drink): There is no point trying to dominate world cricket. Mr. Srinivasan is already doing it by amending various clauses and laws in ICC. We are already the super power of cricket. Now it’s more important for us to work towards inclusive growth of cricket.

Reporter (shocked): Could you please elaborate on it?

MSD (with more assertion): We should make teams at the bottom of the table (weaker section in cricketing society) believe that they are also equally competent. We should empower their spirits our bowling and dropped catches. Even die-hard New Zealand fans wouldn’t have dreamt of such a white wash. These things give a lot of confidence to weaker teams and go a  long way in promoting the game.

We are working towards a larger cause of making cricketing system competitive at least on ground if not in ICC meetings. Even teams at the bottom can dream of routing us now. We demand respect from cricket fans all over the world. We are trying to accomplish something more than just winning a match or a series.

Reporter (Confused): What about McCullum knock? Why couldn’t Indian bowlers get him out?

MSD (with Confidence): Not at all. IPL is starting shortly and he is an important player for CSK. Off late he was short off confidence and needed something big, I bet  it can’t get bigger than this. It is very important he is at his best. He will be playing crucial role for CSK in this year’s IPL. I am very happy looking at the knock, it’s the great buy for us.  (Very cheap indeed  ☺ )

Reporter (Furious):  What about series lost to Australia and South Africa?

MSD (claiming the moral victory) : It’s not important to whom we lose but it’s more important who wins against us. In case of South Africa, we defeated them off the field. We bowled their CEO on a full toss. Win on the field was more of a consolation victory for them.

Reporter: But off late most of the foreign tours we haven’t seen traditional green tops , pitches are somewhat friendly to India.

MSD (with pleasing smile): It’s really nice of the home teams that they make us feel homely even when we are away from India. But that doesn’t mean we exploit this advantage to defeat them. We still need to make it look fair. Finally don’t forget it’s “The Foreign Tour”.

Reporter: What about Australia series?

MSD: Ummmm, forget it. Let’s talk about IPL.

Reporter: How are CSK preparations going on for this year’s IPL

MSD (slightly nervous): We are a great team and most successful in the history of the tournament. You can’t expect same performance every year. But going ahead things might become tough. We will miss our cricket enthusiast supporter Meiyappan a lot. Let’s see how it goes without him. Hope for the best. Fingers crossed!!!

Reporter thanked him for the candid chat.

Confused and trolled reporter had couple of pegs before leaving the pub.