Wednesday, 28th June, 2017

FIFA wants football in subcontinent, asks Rajiv Shukla for help

25, Jun 2014 By rjfahad

After hearing that 1/4th of the world population (India) snores in the second half of every #WorldCup match or switches to Suryavansham on SetMax, FIFA has decided to make football more interesting and subcontinent friendly.

So they approached Rajiv Shukla for suggestions and recommendations to popularize football in the Indian sub-continent. Following are his suggestions.

1. Only 2 defenders should be allowed inside the D for the first 15 minutes. Max 4 for the rest of the game, be it a free kick or a corner kick.

2. Each team can have 5 minutes of ‘super time’ where opposition will have to remove the Goalkeeper from the goal post.

3. Every ‘Host’ country should have the liberty to choose the playing conditions on the field as per there convenience, they can remove the grass totally from the football pitch or can have knee length grass. Whichever way they like to play.

4. Not even a slightest resentment is allowed on the referees decision, if a player gets a Yellow or Red card, he has to smile and say “Thank you”

5. Two referral’s allowed against the Referee’s decision, if the Captain wins the decision then on-field Referee has to apologies. The signal for apology would be holding his ears and doing 2 sit-ups.

6. If the team’s Center Forward is injured, he can ask for a runner, whereas the runner will do the running, dribbling, center forward can rest near oppositions Goalpost only to take the kick. No offside rule for him.

7. Substitutes are not allowed to strike; they can only run or pass the ball.

8. Exchanging of t-shirts after the game be called ‘Dada Act’, players have to swing there t-shirt over there head for 10 sec s before handing it over to the opposition players.

9. He (Rajiv Shukla) and Srinivasan Jain should be accommodated in FIFA governing body; even the entry level is ok for them. (they know how to rise)

10. Pakistan or Pakistani players should not be allowed at any time to play this sport. On Twitter: @rjfahad