Sunday, 25th March, 2018

Dhoni blames India’s progress in the last decade for the debacle against England

07, Dec 2012 By bakeafakecake

Maverick, that the Indian captain is known all over the cricketing world, gave a new found reason for the flat-tyre performance by the Indian team in the on-going Test series against England today. In doing so, he proved he is just not a maverick with the way he bats, keeps, bowls, but also quite different from everyone when it came to giving excuses for humiliating losses.

When asked about the latest reason for another day of forgettable cricket from India, Dhoni in his usual nonchalant demeanor said, “Well, of course a day like this in the field raises a few eye-brows, but if you look at the way cricket is being played in the last decade in India, there is a certain pattern which stems from the changing life-style and the rapidly changing face of our country. Our current performance is quite linked to that.”

Obviously stumped media persons requested for an explanation to the intriguing new theory by the Indian captain, to which he replied, “Well, I will entirely blame the current modern Indian infrastructure, and the modern lifestyle that we have acquired as a nation over the past few years. If you seem more and more stadiums are now fitted with ultra modern facilities to match those of Aus/ England, Our change-rooms have no stink, our food has no worms in it, people in our country don’t go and watch cricket on weekdays anymore and waste their time, they prefer working in offices and be more productive. That is a reason we don’t see stadiums full anymore as well. More and more people have stopped behaving like animals in the stadium, more better looking spectators / girls in the stadiums, no more stone pelting at opposing team’s fielders, no more poster burning, bottle, crap being thrown onto the ground. Just the other day when Cook was in his 90’s, I was having a chat with Virat while Ash was bowling that we don’t see any more dramas on the field by the spectators, and somewhere we are losing our cultural values when it comes to cricket. All this has given a feeling of ‘Foreign conditions’ to our players and we are not sure where to call it home !! Playing in India, we feel like playing away from home in some second world country. This wasn’t the case till early 2000’s. And the records are there for you to see.”

If this was not enough, when asked about how the cricketers from other nations perform well wherever they go, Dhoni said, “Well, that is something for their boards to look into. Variety is the spice of life. If you keep playing the same, excellent and high quality cricket all year around, your fans, and you yourself as a cricketer will get bored of it. I have always said that nothing is permanent but change. So you need to take a break from playing good cricket at times. Having said that, I understand that we have been playing ‘not so good’ cricket for quite some time now, and we look to rectify that soon as we have started to get bored of that, and the IPL is approaching as well”

When asked about his favorite ‘brother from another mother’ – Jadeja scoring another triple ton in domestic cricket, MS said, “Well, more than a brother, I treat him as my son, apart from Suresh. I have always believed in their talents and 3 triple centuries in domestic season just goes to show what class Jaddu belongs to. I know people have started saying that since Jaddu has a great temperament to score triple tons, why not include him in tests rather than ODI’s and T20’s, but these people also need to see where more money and fame is.”