Sunday, 20th August, 2017

Chennai Super Kings to be renamed Ranchi Super Kings

02, May 2014 By zenmaster

Barely hours before Chennai Super Kings play their HOME match in Ranchi against the Kolkata Knight Riders, the franchise has made a shocking announcement that they are renaming themselves Ranchi Super Kings with immediate effect.

Confirming the news, N Srinivasan, supreme leader of the Super Kings, said that “Dhoni thambi” wanted it.

The only Chennaite in team.
The only Chennaite in team.

When we enquired, Dhoni said, “Arey yaar, it makes perfect sense. Ashwin is the only Chennaiite in the Super Kings playing 11. We no longer have Vijay, Badri, Balaji, and Srikanth’s son, what’s his name? We are not truthfully Chennai Super Kings anymore. For a lot of our guys like Mohit, Ishwar, Nehra, Negi and Manhas, Ranchi is so much closer to where they are from. The tipping point was when we played the Delhi Daredevils. Murali Vijay and Dinesh Karthik were speaking in Tamil so that the Chennai players could not understand. After that, how can our conscience allow us to call ourselves Chennai?

Team coach Stephen Fleming said he’s planning to bring batsman Luke Ronchi into the team as a mascot to delight the Ranchi crowd. Team official Russell Radhakrishnan said he would try to organize some raunchy item numbers.

As everything in Indian cricket eventually comes back to N Srinivasan, we did so too, and asked Srini once again for deeper insights. Srini said it’s part of India Cements’ move to have a more national presence. Besides, he said that plenty of workers in his Chennai factories come from states like Jharkhand, Bihar and Orissa anyway, so he can save on train ticket costs by having some factories in Ranchi instead. Most of all, astrologer Arunachaleshwaralingaraju of Aandippatti advised Srini that the name change would be auspicious.

Inspired by this, Pravin Tambe (touted by some as the future of Indian cricket) has joined teammates Ajinkya Rahane and Dhawal Kulkarni in lobbying for Rajasthan Royals to be renamed Mumbai Royals. Vinay Kumar of the Kolkata Knight Riders joined the chorus and said that his team should be renamed Bangalore Knight Riders. The other Bangalorean at the Knight Riders, Robin Uthappa, was unable to comment as he was busy munching on an uthappam.