Ahmedabad: On Saturday afternoon, the Prime Minister’s office conferred Bharat Ratna, the highest Indian civilian honour on Sachin Tendulkar. Everyone’s happiness knew no bounds, except for one Amit Singh, who claims to be the biggest Sachin fan.
When Faking News reporter Mr. Arshad interviewed him about his discontentment, he said, “What Bharat Ratna man? Even Asha Bhosle has one!” Our reporter clarified saying, “Ahem, Asha Bhosle has a Padma Vibhushan sir, not a Bharat Ratna.”
In reply to this, the fan started shouting uncontrollably, “SACHIIIN.. SACHIIIIINNNNN!”
After calming down, Amit replied, “Sachin is the man we have seen since 24 years. He deserves every bit of honour. We will be writing to the Oscar committee to introduce a special lifetime achievement award for him. Also, what he has achieved deserves a Nobel too.”
Our reporter clarified saying that there were no categories under Oscars and Nobel that Sachin would qualify for. How could they be conferred upon him. Amit said, “Dude see, only because of him the other Indian’s tried hard to get the Nobel, to be associated with India, the country Sachin hails from. Also, he has acted in so many different roles on and off the pitch, for a far greater time than people stay alive! Don’t you think that’s as valid and logical an argument for him to win the Nobel and Oscar?” and he continued with his chants of “SACHIIIN… SACHIIIIINNNN!”
Later we came to know he was in a heavily inebriated state.