Monday, 24th April, 2017

Happy Ballantines Day

14, Feb 2017 By alien4dec

New Delhi: As the world singles celebrate Valentines day, majority of married men instead enjoy Ballantine’s day.

Faking news interviewed promoter of Happily Unmarried, an online fun shopping site popular amongst youngsters to understand reason behind celebrating Ballantine’s day.

When Valentine's day turns out to be Ballantine Day
When Valentine’s day turns out to be Ballantines Day

Mr. Kuvara said, “My business partner who was married for a decade once shared his valentine’s day story with me over a peg of Ballantine and post his demise, I even rechristened our business from Happily Married to Happily Unmarried”. He further added, “My partner was an innocent lover. On Rose day he decorated the bed with Roses and post marriage to fulfill his wife’s shopping list he even worked part-time as a marriage hall decorator. He repented proposing his wife, gifting aphrodisiac alcoholic chocolates and a huge teddy bear in the hope of having a great love life while he was surprised, the teddy soon took his position on bed where as he was left to sleep on couch”.

“She promised to never break his heart but the credit cards bills finally one day gave him a massive heart attack.He got kisses and hugs only on his income day and so he started celebrating Ballantine’s day rather than Valentine’s day because celebrating valentine’s day his money got over on 14th Feb itself whereas with Ballantine day his month end were always cozy even without her rosy”.

So, I concluded to remain the most eligible bachelor like Rahul Baba and Salman Bhai and to avoid increasing the business of Archies card and rather focus on my work. Best part of being Happily Unmarried is you celebrate Independence day, every day. He told me, “Honesty is the key to a happy relationship and only if you can fake it, you can be called a Happily Married Man”.

As per the survey, 4% Indian married men cheat in India whereas rest of the Indians cheat in Thailand.Life begins with romantic dates at restaurant and post marriage husband unhappily washes utensils in kitchen. Love is blind but marriage is eye opener which ends husband’s life always with a soda opener.

Initially, Roses are Red, Violets are Blue and finally wife gets monday blues so husband turns to Antiquity blue. Woman worries about the future until she gets a husband while a man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. Earlier life begins with wife, but finally all night ends up watching sunny leone live.

Man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success, so I am happy being a bachelor celebrating Ballantine’s day rather than Valentine’s day.

So, how many of you are celebrating today Ballantine’s day over Valentine’s day?

Cheers!