In a shocking incident that has bamboozled the entire ‘free coupon sites’ aficionados worldwide, a man died yesterday in Mumbai after he failed to redeem his coupon code to order food online.
Krantikaari reporter Shunya Bajpai has told us through his
faaltu err… credible sources that this man identified as Muftkhor Kumar used to live in a palatial bungalow in the tony South Mumbai area.
ACP Pradyuman from CID who is spearheading this case along with two Sr Inspectors and a world-renowned Guinness record holder forensic expert has cordoned off the area and was seen by public rotating his hand and saying ‘Kuch to Gadbad hai’. One of the important clues found was a discount voucher of food ordering website on the backside of which was scribbled ‘I‘m sorry, I couldn’t use you’.
Forensic cum everything expert Dr Salunkhe has ruled out any foul play and has confirmed that the death happened because of prolonged hunger after which there was a minor tiff between him and the ACP.
Fear Factor contestant and part-time Sr Inspector Daya Shetty has further revealed some shocking revelations about this ‘Eat Coupon, Sleep Coupon’ person.
He won his bungalow in a poker contest some years back and since then, right from his Chaddi (Underwear) to his Gaddi (Car), he never bought anything from his own money, thanks to mushrooming of websites like coupon___.com (Fill anything in the blank here).
He mastered his craft to such an extent that he was a revered figure in the coupon world and wannabes used to take tips on coupon redemption strategies and he made tons of them lead a ‘coupon means free‘ life without earning anything.
But yesterday, he met his match when he decided to throw a party after getting a discount coupon through a contest for a leading food ordering website. He was in for a rude shock when at the time of punching the order, the website showed him one message which not only shattered him but made him lose his will to live and which read ‘This Coupon has expired. Better Luck Next time Bro‘.
This was it, he couldn’t take it any more, how could he ‘The undisputed Coupon King’ be denied the opportunity to use the coupon. He frantically tried other coupon websites to get free food, but alas, he ran out of luck. He fought his hunger for 72 hours and finally succumbed.
In order to recognize his efforts in promoting ‘Free Coupon‘ culture amongst the youth, all coupon websites would observe 2 mins of server shutdown and would be giving a coupon code in his honor – ironically for food ordering and which would not expire for one year and all his property & assets would be auctioned on a cheap deal website – proceeds of which would go to sponsor hundreds of aspiring ‘Coupon Enthusiasts’.
ACP Pradyuman has already recommended his name for ‘CID Gallantry Awards’.