Sunday, 25th June, 2017

After success of 'List of movies you watched' feature, FB adds 'List of people you slept with' feature

04, May 2014 By Pareshaan insaan

Seeing the tremendous success of the ‘List of movies you have watched’ and ‘List of TV shows you have watched’ features, Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has decided to add a new feature ‘List of people you slept with’ to Facebook.

This new feature comes after Facebook saw how such features have affected people’s lives. Ankit Dikhawa, a regular user of Fakebook Facebook said, “Such features are the reason why I love FB. Before this feature, none of my 1200 friends knew which movies or TV shows I had watched. I never really felt connected with anyone. But then I decided that it was time to make some changes in my life. So I took a 3 day leave from work and added all watched movies and TV shows to Facebook. As a good Samaritan, I even made this list ‘public’.”

Another girl Nancy, who is a Delhi chick and avid user of Facebook, said, “I always used to feel that my boyfriend is very insensitive. But after he added ‘Baghban’ and ‘The notebook’  to his list of watched movies on Facebook, I now find him overly senti and more feminine than myself.”

The new feature allows Facebook users to add people they’ve slept with into a Facebook list. You can add as many people as you want. By default, if you are a male engineering student, then this feature will be disabled on your profile. Also, if you add more than 15 people to this list, all your friends will receive a notification that you’re a slut.

Guys all over India have welcomed this move. Ganpat Shankar, who is a disciple of TV characters Barney Stinson and Charlie Harper, got excited and added all of his 843 Facebook friends to the list of people he has slept with. Until now, he has failed to realize that only 4 of these are girls, with the other 839 consisting of mostly guys, and some dogs and cats. Another Facebook user Gajendra Albela, who comes from a small town, took things literally and added his parents and his sister to this list, as he’d shared the same bed with them when he was a kid. Gajendra is actually a 43-year old virgin.

Such shameless behavior by many guys has worried a lot of girls, who believe that Facebook is a reflection of their true identity. When asked if people putting untrue information is a problem, Mark Zuckerberg said, “Our research has shown that 94.25% of what’s on people’s Facebook profiles is fake or exaggerated. But majority of the new generation is too dumb to even realize that, so it’s cool.”

Meanwhile, the feature has caused some uncomfortable silence in Bollywood as Karan Johar added SRK to his list and Shiney Ahuja added his maid to his list. We are still trying to investigate how Indian politicians are reacting to this feature. However, we have not been able to get an appointment with anyone, as Rahul Gandhi is busy trying to figure out kaise ek mein se do bache malnourished hai and AK is sitting on a dharna as usual. We will get back with more updates soon.