Tuesday, 20th February, 2018

Wikileaks offers to provide missing Coalgate files; UPA says WTF

21, Aug 2013 By Shaitaan Khopdi ™

Sweden: Julian Assange, the founder of Wikileaks has offered to help Indian Government by providing the backup copies of missing Coalgate, Adarsh and other scams related files.

Wikileaks - Hated by governments across world.
Wikileaks – Hated by governments across world.

UPA government has been assured by Wikileaks founder that there is no need to panic because he has backup of all the scam related files and CBI reports (with ‘spell checked’ versions). However this seemingly assuring mail has created more panic in 10 Janpath and according to the sources ‘Madam-G is not happy’.

Although govt officials refused to acknowledge such offer, Faking News received a confidential e-mail from Wikileaks’ Gmail account confirming the offer made to government of India. Later US secret agency NIA also confirmed that the mail was indeed sent by Wikileaks.

Terrified UPA could not even think of responding with a customary ‘Thank You’. They just said WTF -Wikileaks!!! Trash the Files. To this Wikileaks also responded WTF -We Track Files (we don’t trash file), however India is also asking WTF (Where’re The Files).

Government immediately sent a dossier to Wikileaks condemning them for the leaks and questioning the credibility of Wikileaks. Wikileaks responded by saying that they have the confidence of people which government doesn’t. Interestingly, to put their point across Wikileaks threw in a reading comprehension puzzle in a dossier reply.

TimesOfIndia : FakingNews ::  Govt : Wikileaks

Here is the explanation – “TOI is supposed to be serious news and Faking news is supposed to be fake, but people have started perceiving TOI as Fake news and often take Faking News as seriously.

Similarly, Govt is supposed to have all the information and Wikileaks is supposed to leak it. But recently people have been contacting Wikileaks to get the reliable information while govt is taking care of messing around with important and confidential information. Also getting info from Wikileaks is less risky these days than going the RTI way.”

Amid all this drama ‘Asha Ram’ babu, a clerk in CBI office told Shaitaan Khopdi ™ ‘Since Rakshabandhan is around the corner, I would suggest that our politicians should rather send a ‘Rakhi’ than a dossier to Assange and plead him “Bhai laaj rakh lo hamari election khatam hone tak”’.