Sunday, 22nd April, 2018

War of words: Who knows better?

18, Feb 2013 By Peace Lover

In what could have been termed as an unholy move by the opposition but the people who would have said so are themselves at the centre of this controversy. News channels flashing the reports of the two masters of their art of BSing, those who believed in giving away exaggerate opinions coupled with pompous show of their word usage are none other than M.Tewari and S.Tharoor.

The two verbomaniacs, the hyperpolisyllabicomaniacs, one hailing from north and the other from southern lands. The two used their words to perplex the ones who asked daring questions and get away before those who asked could open their lexicons and comprehend. But until now they were not aware of each other. Both liked to think that no competition existed. But alas! A master strategy and clinically executed move by the opposition.

One of the workers of the opposition in a totally inebriated state rung up and told S.T. that M.T. thinks that the former’s English is as retard as the one who commented on the former’s third wife. And that was it. They came to know about each other and then thunderous slangs, pompous words were what dominate their speeches against each other. Hate speeches within a party.

Commenting on the latest developments, A.Goswami exclaimed “Now who will save the Grand Old Party? Its two face savers are going at each other. The nation wants to know if their word lists would ever expire. But one a sidenote I think there is so much to learn from the passionate usage of English. Yeah! I could use some help”.

Reportedly, K. Thapar was upset at these events and did a devil’s advocate upon himself to introspect if he knew more of the English language. Justice M. Katju said that at this rate of words pouring from TV we Indians will be literate before we knew we were literate and praised the two belligerents for furthering his opinion about Indians necessarily learning English.

Diggy with a lamenting tone said “Now it has devolved upon me to save my party’s interests. I mean you know I can BS with a straight face but that finishing touch of pompous English is clearly lacking in me. For all these years we kept these two heavyweights away from each other. But it was not to be. Maybe we will dangle the prospects of becoming our spokesperson in front of Siddhu or else he would face CBI.”

Last checked the two veterans have exhausted their English words and now are going in local languages slangs. M.T. in a combination of Punjabi and Haryanvi and S.T. in that of Malayalam and Tamil with viewers around the nation applauding their spirit not words.