Monday, 26th June, 2017

Vadra to now buy out Accenture after its report praising Gujarat’s land acquisition model

11, May 2014 By Vaibhav Anand

India’s most famous small farmer, Robert Vadra, is in the running to purchase Accenture’s India operations soon after a report by the company praising Gujarat’s land acquisition model released. People in the know of the deal said that the Gandhis had activated “Operation Vadra” after coming to know of Accenture’s betrayal.

Robert-Vadra-exercises
Vadra on the job

“Mr. Vadra was getting fitted into gold plated pink pants when Soniaji called him, asking him to take vengeance on behalf of the Gandhi family,” a person close to the Gandhi family said, on condition of anonymity. “Vadraji got so excited at the prospect of making truckloads of money again that he ran out of the tailor’s emporium in his underpants.”

“It will be a simple deal, we have it all worked out,” the man continued. “First, Vadraji will float a new company with one lakh rupees in its account. Then he will propose to buy Accenture for a thousand crores using this new company that is, for now, worth one lakh and sign an agreement to this effect, transferring ownership of this company to Vadraji for a consideration of fifty thousand rupees. After this, Accenture’s global arm will pay Vadraji fifteen hundred crores to take Accenture India back from him, which he will use to pay Accenture India and so on.”

“It gets a little too complicated after that,” the man said, “but Mr. Vadra is a private citizen, so why should anybody care?”