Wednesday, 22nd November, 2017

UPA to establish Dr. Manmohan Singh Speech Therapy University Hospital

05, Sep 2013 By ben10

After a long line of Bharat Nirmaan policies, the UPA central government is now looking at establishing a chain of speech therapy institutions under the patronage of Rajiv Gandhi  Dr. Manmohan Singh.

This is after many leading medical journals marveled at how the Prime Minister of the world’s largest democracy broke the David Blaine record for staying silent.

Manmohan Singh
Manmohan Singh thinking if this could help him

Dr. Manmohan Singh has finally come out with his secret of success. A four year course focusing on various aspects of speech therapy to train young aspiring Congress PM candidates in the future.

It also boasts of extensive treatment plans for ‘Citizen Silence Conditioning’ where as guaranteed by the entire central government, you will never have to feel the need to complain, crib, protest or even be bothered by anything be it currency cheaper than peanuts or social injustice of any form.

The course content as released on Tuesday will include subjects like ‘Effective condemnation of any disaster/catastrophe’, ‘Staring into empty space 101’,  ‘How to Ignore Arun Jaitley’ and ‘Advanced Techniques of holding Modi responsible for everything’. There are also various optional subjects right from ‘Gandhi Hospitality’ to ‘Nodding head exercises’.

This is seen as a landmark in the field of education by the central government and will give birth to a whole new generation of compliant citizens and Gandhi-loyal parliamentarians. A famous hypnotist has been flown from Germany who guarantees that the word ‘Gandhi’ will automatically lull every student and patient under him into a sense of euphoria and false security.

Faking News was unable to get any further comments from the Congress supremo or her son, as they were busy at AIIMS, Delhi where their dog Bruno was being treated for a cold by the Head of Medicine.