Friday, 20th April, 2018

Sonia Gandhi wants to teach Indians how to cook Dal Makhani

06, May 2014 By vogonpoem

Buoyed by the success of her televised address to the nation about Bharatiyata, Congress President Mrs. Sonia Gandhi wants to teach Indians how to cook Dal Makhani.

Snazzily titled Maino Fest, this 5 episode series will focus on India’s culinary tradition. Jairam Ramesh explained the meaning of the title: “Its a word-play on Manifesto & will demonstrate Sonia’s understanding of the pulse of the nation”. DLF has already signed up to be a sponsor. A re-run of another 5 episodes is also planned.


Asked about her interest in cooking, Mrs. Gandhi said “My family & cooking go back a long way. We have cooked financial books and college degrees. I studied at Lennox Cook school. BJP gloats that a Chaiwallah will become PM. But we have demonstrated that even a family cook can become President!

She is unfazed by criticism that an Italian cannot teach Indians how to prepare their own food. “I have lived here long enough. In this time, I have demonstrated that one can be loyal to both countries: Italy & Vatican India.  I am planning to introduce novel Indo-Italian dishes like Pasta Priyamvada, ManiKutty & Eggplant Paramasivan, to bring our cultures together”.

Early Dal Makhani samples have received an enthusiastic response from Amethi villagers, as seen below.

Rahul, who played a key role in bringing this idea to fruition, was in one of his psychedelic pensive moods, “See, you have to understand something about India. The other party wants to divide us into Main dish & Side dish. But I strongly feel that this country is like the South Indian dish Avial, where people of all backgrounds come together to be cooked slowly …. ouch!”, he finished before receiving a painful elbow in the ribs from Jairam.

If this idea takes off, 3 more series are planned:

  1. Antique Aunty’s Antics: appraising ancient Indian art, by Sonia’s sister Anuskha
  2. Vadra Shaastra: an astrological guide to land purchases based on Vaasthu principles, by Jijaji
  3. Dalit Tourism: a travel channel, with first-hand anecdotes by Rahul