Friday, 23rd March, 2018

Rahul Gandhi to be first ever recipient of Bharat Ratna Junior award

22, Nov 2013 By iamgreat

Shree Rahul Gandhi blesses the newly instated award.

While the public at large is busy debating if Sachin Tendulkar deserves Bharat Ratna ahead of other sporting great – Major Dhyanchand, the UPA government has announced instilling – Bharat Ratna Junior to keep up with the times that have brought us Indian Idol Junior, Masterchef Junior  and Dance Ke Superkids.

Not surprisingly, Shree Rahul Gandhi has been anointed the first ever recipient of the award. What is surprising though, is that the UPA government will not bring any ordinance to institutionalize the new award which has left the opposition confused and dazed.

On being asked how can UPA expect to introduce and pass the bill that essentially seeks Narendra Modi’s support to felicitate Shree Rahul Gandhi at the time of rigorous election campaigning, sources close to the government revealed a fail proof strategy – nominating Mr. Rahul Gandhi for “recognition of public service of the highest order” similar to Bharat Ratna nomination process.

While the humor generated based on Mr. Gandhi’s public speeches, dreams and general conduct can be considered as public service per-se, the writer found it difficult to believe if the service is of highest order. The writer was immediately put in his place for misjudging Shree Rahul Gandhi’s achievements that are as follows:

  1. Entered politics in 2004 and won the parliamentary elections.
  2. Appointed general secretary of AICC and given charge of Youth Congress and NSUI
  3. Brought unexpected cheer by single-handedly winning 20 seats in UP during 2009 polls.
  4. Believer in secular politics that makes him leader of causes and righteousness and not pompous and aimless leader like others.
  5. At critical decisive times, brought up the issue of Muslim massacre in Modi led Gujarat to the forefront.
  6. Even channelized youth politics tremendously
  7. Appointed Sam Pitroda to rank of cabinet minister
  8. Consistently emphasized to involve youth in various facets of national development
  9. Arrested in Bhatta Parsaul village for supporting agitated farmers
  10. His fresh ideas, assertiveness towards change make him top futuristic leader that nation has ever see.

Given Shree Rahul Gandhi’s focus on youth at young age of 43, it has been decided to confer Bharat Ratna Junior for the time being.  Also, to tame the opposition, in a political masterstroke (of course attributed to Mrs. Sonia Gandhi), Shree Rahul Gandhi has been nominated for his immense contribution in conferring Bharat Ratna to Sachin Tendulkar – which apparently brought immense joy to a billion plus people who overcame their trivial problems of hunger, malnutrition, lack of education and medical facilities, law and order etc. to feel blessed being alive during Sachin Tendulkar era.

Let alone BJP, even Trinamool Congress (from the land of Mohun Bagan and Dada) will find it politically difficult to oppose the award.

Meanwhile sources respectively close to Narendra Modi, Abhishek Bachchan, Rohan Gavaskar, Arjun Tendulkar have demanded instilling Sardar Patel Junior, Megastar Junior, Little Master Junior and God Junior awards.