Friday, 20th April, 2018

PM launches various social networking schemes for common man

09, Oct 2014 By gyaanguru

Prime Minister Narendra Modi launched various  social networking schemes today from his  office after  finishing three rallies in Haryana.

Earlier  in the morning, he was informed by  the Additional secretary , Director  General and his minister for social media communications that not all  Indians  have a FB or a Twitter  account. An upset Prime Minister asked ” Bhaiyya Har aadmi ke paas  FB aur  Twitter ka account hona chahiye ke nahi hona chahiye?” “Sarkar ko iski vyavastha karni chahiye ki nahi karni chahiye” ? in a rally in Haryana. Overwhelmed by a positive response  from the people gathered in the rally , Prime minister promised social networking IDs for all Indians.

He blamed  the Congress for ignoring the needs  of common man for social networking access.

He announced 2 major social networking initiative by the Government

Shyama Prasad mookharji Twitter  Yojana – Aimed at providing twitter accounts for all

Pradhaan Mantri samaajik jan kalyan yojana – Aimed at  providing  free  FB ids for all

“This program will be implemented in a time bound manner.” Year 2019 is the 35th birth anniversary of Mr. Mark Zuckerburg. It is his dream to get  the whole world to get hooked to Facebook.  all Indians will have a social networking access before his 35th Birthday as a mark of respect to him” the Prime Minister  explained his dream to an eager crowd.

“Main Jaanta hoon yeh kaam mushkil hai ” prime minister said requesting everyone to participate in his dream mission.

He said that he has  full faith in the youth of India who have made the whole world dance to the click of their mouse. “Now the whole world will see how we  click pictures and  will try to understand comments like ..OMG that’s chooooo chweet”  Prime minister  said showing confidence in the youth.  “If  everyone opens  a social networking account  this can be easily achieved” he said.

He  said that this initiative will  specifically  benefit women and will usher in a new era of women empowerment. “A lot of rural women do not get  the number  of likes they deserve for their pictures  on FB solely because there are not many FB ids  in the rural areas. If  there are more FB ids,  the chances of them getting  more likes are  very high and even a girl from a remote village can join the 100 likes club instantly if we  have more FB ids ” argued  the PM

“Bhai har Mahila ko uski FB picture par like milna chahiye ke nahi milna chaiye ” asked the PM in another rally to the crowd for which the answer was a resounding “Haan milna chahiye ” though a lot of people were seen asking ” Yeh Facebook aur TVttor ka hota hai? to each other . “A farmer can share the pictures of his farmland with a farmer in China which will help Indian and the Chinese people understand each other better” explained the PM on how  this will benefit  the poor farmer in turn also helping strengthen the sino-indian relations which the PM wants to improve.

“I have just opened a FB account and put my picture my boyfriend Gangu had taken while I was taking a bath yesterday and I got 50 likes with in 1 Hr. No one in my village has ever  received so many likes before ”  said a happy Chamelibai from Paagalpur a small village  in Bihar .

“Yes ..We have received a huge order for Dog meat from China after we shared the pictures of the captured dogs on  FB under this scheme” Said the municipal commissioner of Bengaluru  trying to explain how Bengaluru Mahanagarpalike   has used this scheme for  the welfare  of the citizens .”China is the biggest market  for  dog meat and  given the number  of stray dogs we have, we can become the largest exporter and a market leader and the government is committed to help businesses like these  through this scheme”  said the intelligent  commerce minister flashing his Tab which showed the  data for the last 10 year on Chinese dog meat consumption. He was  trying to showcase  his business acumen in a discussion  on CNBC TV 18 on how this scheme can help small and medium enterprises . ” The Prime Minister  is a visionary” he added

The  Engineering  colleges went abuzz with this announcement  and hailed  the Prime Minister as Tech Savvy and pro-youth. “The  PM has recognised our efforts  today. We  have tried to convince our parents  that FB and Twitter are the 2 most important thing in our social life  but they insist that we  spend  more time on studying.”  Bekaar Kumaar Varma, a third year Mechanical Engineering student said.

Engineering students will now go from village to village and help people open facebook and twitter  accounts.

Shashi Tharoor  yet again took this opportunity to congratulate the PM on this  great initiative and come closer to the PM. Kapil Sibbal and Kerala CM Omman Chandy were seen dicussing his tweets and drafting a showcause notice to him. Sibbal was convinced that this launch will not impact and will result in  Zero gain for BJP and Zero loss  for Congress in the upcoming elections.