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Parliament to go hi-tech, proceedings by video conferencing

10, Feb 2014 By Kannan

The dark horse in the race of Prime Minister, Nandan Nilekani has proposed another unique sytem to the President. The idea is abandon the practice of assembling all MPs in the parliament.

Parliament
Silence will prevail

Rather, under the new system, offices of all MPs in their respective constituencies would be wired together and they will be participating in the meetings. Switches to all of their connections would be in the panel in front of the speaker, who doubles as a radio jockey.

Mr. Nilekani has already estimated the budget and turned out that the cost would be less than that is being spent in running (or not running) the parliament for three consecutive days. Annual savings would be added to MPLADS fund, so that new system would be attractive even to the MPs. For any voting, left click and right click of a specially prepared voterat would be used. Votes would be automatically calculated by the system and this gives leverage to the party’s whips in identifying those who indulge in cross voting.

On seeing the presentation made by Nilekani, President Pranabda has immediately sanctioned the required amount. Pranabda wants this system to be commissioned before next elections so that he can conduct the swearing-in ceremony from his bedroom. Meira kumar expressed her unpleasantness to Nilekani for getting such a beautiful idea, so lately, i.e., at the fag end of current parliament. Nevertheless she conveyed her happiness saying “better late than never”.

Chidambaram has already started counting other benefits of this scheme. For one, there will not be any allotments of bungalows to those MPs who are not ministers. Second, there will be no travels needed to Delhi and load on already sinking Air India will be less. He hopes that Air India really flies, if such schemes are implemented to Babus also. However, Ajit Singh feels, this will reduce his control on Air India, but it seems nobody is caring.

Main opponents of this scheme are, as expected the left parties and Mulayam Singh. In a special bulletin signed by the blood of Azam Khan’s Buffalo, they condemned the move terming it as curbing the powers of perennial opposition. “If you are not in front of us, whom shall we curse? No mikes to break, no papers to tear, no well to rush in. This is not democracy”.

Chandrababu Naidu, probably will be made speaker of such a parliament, for life time. He was recommended by Jagan Reddy to remember his services in turning Hyderabad into Cyberabad. However, sources close to Jagan informs the real motive: “Given such an opportunity, Naidu will not refuse. He will remain radio jockey for his life time, while Jagan Reddy can sell lands of even neighbouring states to bogus companies.

Narendra Modi acknowledged the merits of the proposal with a pinch of salt. “This is only to prevent the BJP from feeling powerful. However, we Gujaratis are innovative. Once in Power, we extend this to all state assemblies, Municipalities and Gram Panchayats”.

Rahul Gandhi claimed innocence of this proposal.  He distanced himself completely from the proposal and the after effects.  In case everyone feels this should not be done, he plans to tear the proposal in front of the media.  Will he get a chance?  He even doesn’t know this also.

Apparently, Mukesh Bhai Ambani has already informed all top IT companies that whoever will win the control of these servers for the next ten years, will be bought by Reliance Parliamentary Affairs Unlimited, a new company that would be incorporated tomorrow.