Monday, 23rd April, 2018

On Diwali, EC bans Laxmi Puja claiming BJP, Congress and BSP symbols visible on idol

01, Nov 2013 By Shaitaan Khopdi ™

New Delhi: Chief election commission of India has acted swiftly on a complaint lodged by AAP party president Arvind Kejriwal in which he has asked a blanket ban on Laxmi Puja along with Rahul Gandhi-Digvijay Singh jokes and Narendra Modi/Feku jokes.

Hand, Lotus and Elephant

Last week EC had rejected an equally crazy complaint demanding ban on all the lotus ponds in MP.

Kejriwal had complained that these jokes which are widely circulated on social media could influence voters in favor of BJP and Congress. Those who enjoy Feku jokes become congress voter, and people enjoying RaGa-Diggy jokes favor BJP. What does AAP get? Shaitaan Khopdi™ sheepishly replied ‘Babaji ka Thullu’.

However EC refused to put complete ban on jokes as they recognize that India needs their daily dose of laughter. We know that our citizens are badly stressed and cracking jokes on politicians gives them a comic relief.

So we have suggested that all Rahul-Diggy/Rahul-MMS jokes to be reworded and turned into Santa-Banta jokes. Santa-Banta jokes also celebrate stupidity in public life. Similarly Feku jokes on Narendra Modi will be replaced by Rajnikanth jokes since both type of jokes are based on projecting impossible tasks being done by the protagonist.

We have also taken suo moto cognizance of the possible Kejriwal jokes and asked people to use ACP Pradyuman/CID format to crack Kejriwal joke. Both of them are high on detective content, explained Chief Election Commissioner of India.

CEC informed in a press conference that it is also considering Kejriwal’s appeal of asking people to worship Lord Ganesh alone, not Goddess Laxmi; this Diwali. Idol of goddess Laxmi carries a lotus (BJP), a blessing hand gesture (Congress) and is accompanied by an elephant (BSP).

This is unfair advantage to Congress, BJP and BSP. Hearing this, Kejriwal immediately raise his fingers in ‘V’ amidst loud cheer of AAP supporters. But his smile wiped off quickly when he heard next line. “During Diwali people clean up their houses.

We are planning to put ban on cleaning too. Broom is widely used while cleaning, which is election symbol of AAP.  These are tough times for the country. We are living in a country where people’s minds stink, where a girl doesn’t feel safe even in Metro rail. People should rather cleanup their morals and consciences before cleaning up their homes” concluded an emotional looking Election commission chief.