In a meeting that ran late into the night, Cabinet has given its approval to levy 100% luxury tax on sale of onions in India. This move was long anticipated especially after onion prices touched Rs. 100 a kg, and hence inaccessible for the day to day use of the common man.
“Congress ka haath,aam aadmi ke saath“,exclaimed Sh. Rahul Gandhi after the historic decision was taken on the eve of India’s independence day. But when probed how this move will help the “aam aadmi“, he was, as usual, clueless and threw some random idea to confuse our reporter. “Our government is a proponent of inclusive growth. We can’t see the filthy rich consuming onions while their poor brethren as bereft of this luxury. Since my statement proves that onions are now a luxury, mom thought of levying luxury tax and hence this
random decision by the Cabinet.”
While it’s still unclear how this move will bring down onion prices and hence help the common man, highly placed sources reveal that simple measure like checking illegal hoarding and pumping government stocks into open markets could have helped the cause.
While the entire nation was taken by a shock over this development, we could see 3 newly inducted cabinet ministers celebrating the news. “Only an year remains before elections take place and we lose our seats. With almost all major scams already happened and Government finances in doldrums, we were apprehensive as to how we will rob the nation . Thanks to this decision, we would now have enough funds so that our scams can see the light of the day“, revealed one of them.
As usual, Behenji and Didi cried foul over the news and demanded government subsidy on onions. Till the filing of this report, Arnab Goswami was still fuming and making onions cry in the NewsHour.