NEW DELHI: Congress party has just announced here at the party headquarters that Sidhartha Mallya, 26yr old son of once-a-millionaire-now-penniless Vijay Mallya, has been inducted in the party as a spokesperson.
Sidhartha will be joining the team of other intellectuals such as Sanjay Jha, Tehseen Poonawalla, Shahzad Poonawalla, Priyanka Chaturvedi, Alka Lamba, Ajay Maken etc. Sidhartha will also be actively involved in Twitter trolling and spreading his gyaan through social media.
Information and Broadcasting minister Manish Tewari told reporters here “We are delighted to have Sid in our team now. He brings with him a lot of experience in handling youth problems and social issues. He has been actively involved in the uplifting of women across the world, literally. We welcome him in Congress party and the UPA coalition. Rahul Baba has conveyed his heartiest congratulations to Sid and also invited him to his Disneyland trip next month.”
Tehseen Poonawalla (self-proclaimed Amitabh Bachhan of twitter) had this to say “Heya my lovely tweetos, pleased to welcome Sid on board. Our team ‘Richie Rich’ has never lost a game on PS3 and Xbox, and we hope to continue the same. Kalmadi uncle have told us that running a country is very similar to playing Call of duty – Black Ops! Okie dokie now I have to go to gym and then to Subway for my less-calorie salad. Oh how bad do I feel for the poor of this nation…burppp…okie much love!” (sic)
Sources have confirmed that Sidhartha Mallya will undergo a crash course training in the Rajiv Gandhi Pagal Banao University in Rae Bareli in Uttar Pradesh.
Sources also tell us that Sidhartha Mallya decided to join Congress to get rid of all the debts that his father owes to almost every individual in India. Robert Vadhera has already offered his help to Sidhartha and teach him how to mint-money in Indian politics.
It is also believed that Tehseen Poonawalla inspired him a lot to join active politics and convinced him that ‘you need not know anything about the nation, its history, past and the present, you can still claim your position in politics with the help of money and pay media houses to call you on debates and discussions to get famous.’
Sidhartha Mallya who is currently enjoying the sun in Ibiza told this to us on phone “a a a a I am very happy and ha ha ha ha high as a kite right now. I ho ho ho hope to do something for myself..err..country and make it a better p p p p place for my father and myself. Thanks to Rahul, I owe you one mate lol…much love..cheers!”