Monday, 19th February, 2018

Government to set up Blast Recuperation Centers

27, Feb 2013 By thejokeryj

In a major move aimed at securing a moral victory over terrorists, the government is planning to set up “Blast Recuperation Centers (BRCs)” in all major cities across India.

Faking News reporter got in touch with a Minister who, on conditions of anonymity, explained the hidden meaning behind this agenda.

“Especially since Afzal Guru has been hanged, Shri Hafeez sayeed ji and other terrorists have become very angry and are plotting revenge. So we are setting up BRC’s all over the country to outsmart them and counter their plans,” he said.

When asked how in god’s name this could be effective when there are urgent priorities like setting up National Counter Terrorism Center (NCTC), the Minister replied, “God knows when and where these terrorists will plant a bomb next, so why waste so much money by setting up NCTCs in so many cities? Instead we will build  blast recuperation centres. They will have all the facilities for blast victims.”

“Also there will be a helipad on the terrace so that politicians can save the travelling time. There will be TVs in all the rooms where the victims will be shown different English media channels explaing how resilient blast victims are. It  can also be used as Congress government office to carry out development works like educating people about the importance of Rahul Gandhi ji. Besides, think of all the money we can make, CWG and 2G will lick BRC’s ass  feet!” he concluded.