Monday, 23rd April, 2018

Dog arrested in Karnataka for attempting bogus voting for BJP

06, May 2014 By none

In what can be described as the most bizarre incidents of Elections 2014, a stray dog has been arrested for attempting bogus voting in Nayeenahalli village in Northern Karnataka.

Street Dog
Poor dog

Electoral officials were amused when a street he-dog patiently stood in the voter queue, sneaked in between the feet of the policeman, tumbled the ink pot on his front left paw and proceeded towards the EVM. However, it is only when the dog was found trying to press the button made for human fingers against the lotus symbol that the officials realized that the dog was trying to vote.

As the dog, who goes by single name Nayee, didn’t have valid voter id, naturally the attempt was characterized as attempt to bogus vote. Immediately police got into action and arrested the dog.

Investigative journalists of Faking News visited Nayeenahalli to investigate this story. The village is so far flung and devoid of any infrastructure that the story is reaching to us so late.

There are no roads, no drinking water, no school – and most of all, no electric connection within 25 km of Nayeenahalli. As per the village priest, the full name of the village is Nayeena-jeevana-halli [village of a dog’s life], shortened as Nayeena-halli [village of a dog].

It is reported that the whole village erupted in joy when Narendra Modi was announced as the prime ministerial candidate from BJP. Everyone is nurturing deep hope of getting at least electric lines to the village. “Even if for hanging clothes, we need electric lines!” said Seethamma, a 60 year old lady. “In Bangalore my sister does it regularly!” said she, unaware of the other benefits of getting electric line.

Our sources gathered that the dog Nayee, was also at forefront of the celebration. Our main problem was to communicate to this hyper-civilized dog. Finally we came across one Mr. Nanjappa, who helped us with the translation – from Doggish to Kannada to English.

Nayee, through Nanjappa, explained that he just represents a large section of he-dogs who were ready to do anything, including of bogus voting, to see Mr. Modi in power. “These Congress folks are so much behind women empowerment; they have virtually ignored all males. This converted every he-dog into a BJP voter and a Modi supporter. Think of Modi, think of electricity, think of electric poles! Which he-dog would like to live in a bone-dry village where there aren’t any electric poles?”

Deprived of polling, Nayee resorted to pole-ing barking:

Ab hogee har kutte kee darkaar

Ab kee baar, Modi sarkar!