Sunday, 18th February, 2018

Congress launches Counter-Modi Statistics department

20, Jul 2013 By dizzyreporter

Delhi. With Lok Sabha polls approaching, Congress today announced its new poll management department called the “Indira Gandhi Counter-Modi Statistics Department”. The Primary function of this department would be to intently listen all Modi speeches and then Google the statistics mentioned by him. “It is a brilliant Idea conceived by our great leader Rahulji while he was having his haircut in Europe”, said one of the congress leaders proudly.

The initial staff of this department consists of Tewari, Sibal, Jayram and some other excellent speakers and mass-comm leaders. Digvijay Singh has been appointed the head of this department. “Its a great initiative by Shri Soniaji to look at the flip-side”, reacted Digvijay while taking over as the chief. On being asked the need of this department and inclusion of already elite ministers like Tewari and Sibal into it, Digvijay had an interesting explanation. “You know in last 9 years we never looked at the flip-side, so this is a good opportunity for all of us to prepare for CA finals, as far as Tewari goes it will help him add some content into his speeches. Sibal on the other hand can evolve his “zero-loss” theories and apply it everywhere. He will be the next Aryabhata from India!”.

Though the actual role of Digvijay Singh is not confirmed yet as all the ministers of the department will be doing all the work. “You know when Modi doesn’t speak, Digvijay will come into picture. He has this excellent ability to generate Data and flip the coin,” informed one of Congressman with a glowing face.

Congress certainly is getting battle-ready for the 2014 polls!