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Congress announces Rahul’s 'Maun' rally in Delhi

11, Nov 2013 By iamgreat

New Delhi. Everybody at the press conference was amazed and slightly puzzled when Congress spokesperson Mr. Dijvijay Singh announced that Congress Vice President Mr. Rahul Gandhi will be holding a ‘Maun’ (silence) rally in Delhi, sometime next month. Rahul Gandhi will address the rally by keeping mum on the stage but will pull up his sleeves 20 times during the address to show his youthful vigour.

Rahul_Gandhi
Rahul Gandhi showing trying hard to keep shut.

One of the senior leaders, on condition of anonymity disclosed the discussions and brain-storming that went behind this unprecedented decision. He revealed that Sonia Gandhi was highly pissed off with Rahul Gandhi’s speech writing team and called a high level party meet to discuss the poor response of speeches. “I had, by now become accustomed to the number of jokes making the rounds on social media after each rally of Rahul, but district level presidents and senior party workers giggling during his speech is not acceptable.” Manishankar Aiyar responded that “we joke-proofed his last two speeches by having trial runs with Mr. Navjot Singh Sidhu and Ms. Archana Pooran Singh and even they could not laugh on a single line. But these speeches were blasted by Modi and raised controversy in media.”

Manish Tiwari, convener of the Rahul Gandhi’s speech writing team, expresses concern that they have tried everything – from philosophy to aeronautics; from physics to family drama but nothing seems to be working and they would “need holistic and paradigm shift in their rally strategy”. After long discussion, finally Ahmed Patel came up with the idea of Maun (silence) rally to counter “Hunkar” (roar) rally. He is said to have derived his inspiration suddenly from the Prime Minister, when PM spoke after three hours of silence to seek permission for drinking water.

Congress is hopeful that this will give no chance to opposition or media to scoff at Rahul Gandhi. However, the social media is highly disappointed by this announcement and planning to sign an online petition, claiming that Congress can not take away public’s “Right to Laugh”. Famous comedian, Kapil Sharma, has also expressed deep regret saying that if ‘Maun’ rally trend continues for long, he will have to cut-down his popular TV show “Comedy Nights With Kapil” to half an hour, because of lack of “inspiration”.