Saturday, 21st October, 2017

Chetan Bhagat to change name to Chetan Liberal, says word “bhagat” sounded too close to “bhakt”

20, Jul 2015 By Pagla Ghoda

Mumbai: Extremely talented writer and crusader of anti-bhakt causes on social media, Mr. Chetan Bhagat has apparently planned to change his name to Chetan Liberal and has also planned to publish the name-change legal notices in those few newspapers of India which still sell more than 500 copies per week.

The notice is yet to be published but we were able to procure the actual text of this name-change notice from our well-places sources. Below is the complete text of the notice (some cheap sexual innuendos edited out considering some of our under-age readers):

Chetan Bhagat
Don’t call me Bhagat, or I will call you sexually frustrated non-English speaking troll.

I, Chetan Bhagat, author of my recent book “Half Girlfriend” hereby change my name to Chetan Liberal. As mentioned in a previous article of mine I do not wish to get associated with “bhakts” or “bhagats” at all. All parties consequently affected due to this change, either intervene right now and stop me, or stay quiet forever. Those parties who are romantically inclined can also read my other books such as Two States and 5 point someone. These books are available on all major book stores.”

“You can also see me on Television in the music talent show Nach Baliye as a consultant judge. My name change will reflect in all legal documents and all my social media handles with immediate effect. If you are a fan, which I bet you are, please don’t forget to follow me on these social networks and help me build more socially relevant discussions, throughout the country.

Yours Verbosely,

CL (earlier CB)

While the literary world has not yet responded to Mr. CL’s decision, some of the veteran twitter celebrities have already gone ahead and commented on this change via tweets:

“He could have called himself Chetangez Khan or Chetweshwar Sindhi, that would have been secular. Chetan liberal sounds too preachy.” ~ Shagorika Di

“Though principally convoluted, Chetan’s new name is inarguably ecclesiastic, although not economically viable to the poor.” ~ Dr. Amartya Bhimsen

“चेतन को चाहिए के खुद से क्षमा मांग ले, ऐसा करने पर पूरा ब्रह्माण्ड उसे क्षमा कर देगा।” ~ Baasiram Baapu

“He looks quite like me, I think he also loves farmers, like I do.” ~ Rahul Gandhi

“When kumkum bhagya changes complete storylines no-one bats an eye-lid, an author changes name, all hell breaks loose. Unfair” ~ Rahul Prakashan

“Change kar liya naam CB ne, chalo theek hai, ab sab log khud ko busy karo, nahin to I am quitting twitter, ask SRK, ask Amir.” ~ BeingSalluBhai

It is also being rumored that this whole name change incident is being woven to publicize a new book which CB is going to come out within next few months. While the name of the new book is not yet out in the market, the storyline of this book is rumored to be revolving around a Mumbai girl who falls in love with a Chennai boy but ends up in a lesbian affair with boy’s distant cousin from Kolkata. The Mumbai girl then “changes her name” to a boyish name, to be with her love. On a wild-goose chase away from relations and society they finally tie a knot during a pride parade in São Paulo.