Tuesday, 26th September, 2017

BJP to select Vada pav vendor as Maharashtra CM candidate

19, Aug 2014 By Swan

Mumbai: As BJP is trying to get media savvy with the buying of media agencies for upcoming Maharashtra assembly elections, the BJP President has announced a hunt for a Vada Pav vendor who is willing to work part time as CM of Maharashtra.

If sources are to be believed, Madison- a leading media agency has been helping BJP getting data as regards to the expectations and the impact making attributes for CM in Maharashtra.

The agency came up with suggestion as to selecting a Vada Pav vendor with excellently good public speaking abilities and command over Marathi as main requirements. The agency has already started accepting resumes from interested Vada Pav vendors and the shortlisted candidates are to be interviewed by RSS.

The RSS has established a stringent selection process- ‘The candidate is to have a typical Hindu-Marathi surname, he should visit temple minimum ten times a day and flaunt tilak on his forehead, should have a loving mother who is old enough so that she cannot speak to media about your misdeeds, should be comfortable wearing shorts and Dhoti whenever required.

Soho, BJP appointed advertising agency then plans to reutilize strategies which it used during the Lok Sabha elections- different Vada Pav centers would be set up all across the state to showcase support to the CM, Opposition leader would be paid to create controversy on the candidate’s education, profession and marital status so that he is limelight.

Google has been approached to tweak its Search algorithm so as to keep him in top of Search list. Interview with Arnab Goswami would be arranged in Marathi so as to keep Arnab’s aggressive questioning in check.

BJP is confident as after the chai-wallah the vada-pav wallah will win the election as elections are now won on marketing and advertising rather than the candidates background or his political abilities and capabilities. RSS agrees as that for CM candidate we just need a character of our choice and the rest is marketing.