New Delhi. Cornered on all fronts on the Vyapam scam, BJP has finally managed to find a scape-goat. When asked about the Kingpin behind the scam, the BJP spoofsperson gave a complete new spin to the scam that’s already spinning out a lot of skeletons in its wake: “The entire design and blue-print of the scam – involving use of an impersonator to take exams in place of the real candidate – was the brain child of Munnabhai”, the spoofsperson claimed.
The spoofsperson also brought out chronological linkages to justify his claim, “Munnabhai provided us with the ‘proof of concept’ of the Vyapam arrangement way back in 2003, by showing how the feat could be achieved. What we did later, from 2004 onwards, was only implement the scheme and adopt a few dozen variations to the same..”, the spoofsperson added.
When asked whether the perpetrators would be brought to book, the spoofsperson clarified, “Arre Munna ki toh pehle se he vaat lagi hui hai. The Kingpin is already in jail with the master-mind behind the bars even before the scam unfolded, we have set a new standard of first ensuring that the guilty is brought to book, and only then indulged in the scam.”
An enraged reporter protested something to the effect ‘how wrong all this felt’, to which the spoofsperson assured, “We promise that we have set ourselves on the Gandhian path. Its just that the beginning is scary. But don’t worry, the long arm of lawmakers would not spare anyone and every case will be ‘closed’. The ending would turn out very well for all of us”
The enraged reporter wanted to ask another one, but quite inexplicably found himself shaking and incoherent his mind started drifting to an eerie Title of an Agatha Christie short – “And then there were none”.