In what can only be termed as the most astounding allegation of the year, or probably even decade, Congress has alleged that almost 80% of all websites in the world have saffron leanings and hence support BJP.
In a press conference earlier today, Congress scion, Rahul Gandhi, the first of his name, feeling emphatic over his first ever successful parliamentary disruption, had this to say:
“Almost all websites including NDTV, IBNLIVE, FIRSTPOST, Google News etc has rightist saffron leanings and do support BJP”
Reporter 1 with common sense, possibly from Hindu: “Sir, why do you feel that? Especially about NDTV? Isnt it your offical mouthpiece?”
RG: “Yes, we no longer know who our friends and our enemies are. Vyapam has created a lot of wealth and bees will go to juicy flowers only na?!”
Congress stooges on the side line: “Waah, kya dialog hai sir. Rahul Baba zindabad”
Possible FP reporter: “Sandipan Sharmaji isse bahut nakush honge! After all the articles he has been writing for you, it’s ridiculous to suspect his loyalty”
RG: “See, these are difficult times for us, we are down to 144 in the parliament, and now that Vadraji’s income has not been all that consistent, allies can turn to foes”
Reporter 1 with common sense, possibly from Hindu: “Sir, it’s 44 not 144”.
RG dials Maata on his latest Xiaomi Mi6, “Mummy, should I admit that we have 44 or 144? … Oh ok, are you sure? Baad mein ShashiJi ki jaise mujhe bhi danto ge nahi – Ghar ka maamla ghar se baahar laane ke liye…..“
RG: “Ok ji, it’s 44. But we are also fighting against BJP’s attempt to withdraw section 144 from Kashmir – after all it’s only because of 144 that we still have Kashmir with us, my great-grand father Nehruji’s legacy yaar!”
Reporter 1 with common sense, possibly from Hindu: “Sir, that’s article 370”. An unidentified flying object in the shape of a full blown human palm scoops over and gobbles up the reporter then and there.
When nobody dared to question the elephant in the room, Shashi Taroor donned his reporter hat and rose up to question RG.
“RG, why do you believe all these news channels are saffronized? Don’t alienate them. I know Vadraji has taken a hit, but we still have our cash cow – IPL”
RG: “Taroorji, aap mummy se maar khaoge, how many time should I get mummy to tell you not to question me in public?”.
“But, this time. I have done my homework. I must say , these websites are gutsy – they overtly display their allegiance on their websites.Every channel is so saffronized that they have THE saffron mother ship’s name, RSS embedded right into their websites. Just scroll down completely in any of these sites, you can see RSS right there – Parda Phash!! My new found BP goes out of control. “
that too in saffron color!