Saturday, 23rd September, 2017

Adani and Ambani to buy AAP

27, May 2014 By counterview

Fed up of the constant attack on their business empires, Adani and Ambani have offered to buy the Aam Aadmi Party. It’s a joint venture setup by the two colossus and if the deal goes through , the new entity will be called Adani-Ambani Party, so as to retain its moniker of AAP.

AAP ink attack
AAP leaders celebrating the deal.

With the 2014 General Elections over, the deal is a done thing feel people in the know. AAP have only a handful ( less than a handful actually i.e 4) , it would be more profitable to exit now( than wait for 2019 elections), is what the promoters founding members feel.

Ambani/Adani have hired Mc-Twinky consultants to value the party. A back of the envelope calculations shows a valuation of  Rs. 2747,85,00,000 (2617 X 10500000), fashioned after the facebook-whatsapp deal. The deal is expected to be signed at the cross-road where kejriwal slept on the road during his dharna to get 2 lowly police chowki incharges dismissed.

On being questioned whether the deal was to get AAP off their combined backs, the spokesperson denied this and said that, with this historic deal, we hope to bring professional lobbying to India. So far we have spent zillions of rupees lobbying with the government for better deals. Now we hope to utilize jan-shakti for the same purpose. The huge user base of AAP  (1.05 crore) will be utilized to sit on dharnas and spam the hell out of internet websites/news portals to influence public view and hence the government to our POV.

The established political parties (read Congress and BJP) are aghast at this development. They said, “This is a sad day for the country. This blatant disregard for established rules is disruptive innovation at its worst. We prefer that the control of business over politics should be hidden and sinister.”

AAP spokesperson was unavailable for comment.