Friday, 18th August, 2017

WHO warns India to control bad breath, hair dandruff and stained clothes

11, Jul 2014 By swaroski

After having solved all third world problems like poverty, starvation, dengue, chicken guinea,  rape, housing, employment, terrorism, cricket as the only sport, etc., many people in India were wondering what exactly should the role of the government be.

There were lengthy discussions over this in the parliament but neither the opposition nor the ruling parties could find any problems that needed to be solved. Many parliamentarians even huddled together in the middle of the parliament before every session to discuss a problem. In keeping with the true tradition of bonhomie in the parliament, sweets were distributed, kisses were exchanged and name plates were decorated with garlands. Some even considered cloud seeding to allow divine intervention to bolster ideas in their brain.

Until today, this utopia would have survived and Ram-Rajya would have continued to thrive on the only region of the planet earth. But, the World health organisation released their report with a clear warning to India that they are yet to solve problems like bad breath, hair dandruff, stained clothes, split ends, salt less toothpastes, etc. In a move that aims to clearly ridicule the government, WHO has cautioned that these problems could take pandemic proportions and dispel rumours that India is a paradise land.

In response to this unpleasant news, the government has taken measures at supersonic speed. Our correspondent spoke to a visibly worried advertiser, who whispered, on the condition of anonymity, ” We have been asked to work under constant pressure to deliver advertisements that address the urgent need of bad breath, hair dandruff, stained clothes and a complete list of such problems are provided to us. Our task is to make people buy related products that will help them get rid of these problems once and for all. From now on, you will always see commercials of shampoos, detergents, toothpastes, hair oil, UV protective creams, that can hit the nail on the head. People will certainly be able to pin point the most important threat to the nation. We can no more afford to live under the hallucination that all is well.”

Let us see if these steps can help us get rid of these unforeseen events. The nation is watching with bated breath.