BJP leader Subramanian Swamy says article 377 against unnatural sex is still valid. He says “Supreme court defends your right to privacy. But that doesn’t mean two men can kiss in public. One of them must dress up like Smriti Irani”.
Early today India’s Apex court unanimously upheld Indians right to privacy as a fundamental right. The world democratic nations applauded this ruling. However, the ruling party BJP won’t have this nonsense. It despatched a brigade of hounds to play down this historic bitchslapping.
Union law minister RaviShankar Prasad said “this right is not absolute. It comes with reasonable restrictions. We douchebags in government get to decide those restrictions.”
BJP MP Amit Shah laughed “if you strike down article 377, we will enact another article 377.01 and pass it off as money bill”.
Delhi CM Arvind Kejriwal sighed a huge relief “I called Arun Jaitley an asshole. But it was a private chat! I will save $2M now!”
The aadhaar crusader Nandan Nilekani said “soon I will become the head of infosys and breach your data. You can’t do jackshit! I will sniff out all you gays and lesbians!”.
The communist media Scroll.in, The Hindu and TimesNow went hyperactive: “privacy violations happen only in communist countries. Not in our democracies, until we come to power”. Their leader Yechury said “I am relieved. Now I don’t have to disclose my fat bank account in Barclay’s bank”.
TN chief minister Edapadi wanted to know if it is ok for him and deputy CM Panneerselvam both to dress up as women and kiss before the press. He said “we have been doing it as men from the time of merger”.
Bengal CM Mamata Bannerjee declared “I am going to kiss my dog, since I have no men here worthy of a kiss. I challenge BJP to act against me!”
PM Modi defended himself “I did not kiss Donald Trump! I merely hugged him tightly, gave a warm backrub and squeeze!”