SuperStar Rajini has been selected for the coach position of Indian cricket team. BCCI has also proposed that Kohli and his boys aren’t needed anymore, since Rajini himself can handle all the eleven player roles. If necessary he will be the umpire and referee too, total of 14 roles.
Film Director Mani Ratnam said “if Rajini hits one, it is like hitting 100 times, hence a century”.
SuperStar Kamal Hasan said “I did Dasavatharam, ten roles. Rajini has beat me with fourteen!”
Rajini’s plan was welcomed by Ravi Shastri “as long as he leaves the commentator job to me, I am happy!” Sunil Gavaskar went nostalgic “In 1971 I was a superstar like Rajini”.
BJP MP Subramanian Swamy opposed Rajini’s selection. He said “Rajini has committed financial irregularities. He is as guilty as Arun Jaitley, Amit Shah and Nitin Gadkari! He should not join cricket unless he is with BJP”.
Arun Jaitley quipped “if Rajini plays 14 roles, he should get as many Aadhaar cards and pay tax in each of them”.
Former cricket captain Kapil Dev beamed a smile “रजिनी का जवाब नहीं” Star cricketer Virat Kohli said “I will delete all pro Rajini tweets immediately! I can also pose better than Kapil Dev for palmolive ad!”
Vijay Mallya wanted Rajini in his IPL team to play against State Bank of India, in London. He said “SBI has been throwing googly after googly at me and only Rajini can save my side”.
This masterstroke by BCCI sent shock waves across the cricket world. Pakistan cricket board faxed its surrender in the next three world cup matches. Aussie team demanded a handicap of three innings to play against India. The English team covered the Lords cricket ground and converted it an indoor stadium. Apparently only this can block Rajini’s sixes.
PM Narendra Modi expressed his happiness at this development “I am happy Rajini is not a candidate for the President post. I will personally meet Rajini after my 83 nation tour ends in December. Right now I am in Portugal selling cow label Patanjali products”.