After the successful creation of the Y-Bomb, which will leave all men in India Libido-less, the same scientists who created it have also come up with a process for men with good intentions to get their Libido or Mojo (Sex Drive) back. Inspired by the movie Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (where a spy loses his Mojo and eventually gets it back), the scientist have devised a way to reinstate Libido in the male human species.
Fearing that the libido may fall into the wrong
sack hands, some social activists have come up with measures to control libido use. Inspired by Obama’s gun control initiatives announced yesterday, one activist said “If US has come up with strict laws for gun control, we in India need strict laws for libido control”
The following are the Obama inspired Libido Control initiatives proposed by the activists:
|Obama’s US Gun Control Initiatives||Proposed Libido Control Initiatives for India|
|Require criminal background checks for all gun sales.||Require criminal background checks for all men applying for Libido|
|Take four executive actions to ensure information on dangerous individuals is available to the background check system.||Take four executive actions to ensure information on Rapists & Molesters is available to the background check system during issue of Libido.|
|Reinstate and strengthen the assault weapons ban.||Reinstate and strengthen Libido ban on men with criminal background.|
|Restore the 10-round limit on ammunition magazines.||Restore the 10 minute limit on Libido use per day.|
|Protect police by finishing the job of getting rid of armor-piercing bullets.||Protect police by finishing the job of getting rid of potential molesters & rapists.|
|Give law enforcement additional tools to prevent and prosecute gun crime.||Give law enforcement additional tools to prevent and prosecute crimes against women.|
|Make our schools safer with more school resource officers and school counselors, safer climates, and better emergency response plans.||Make our streets safer with more Police, safer climates, and better emergency response plans after reporting a crime.|
|Help ensure that young people get the mental health treatment they need.||Help ensure that young people get the sex education they need.|
|Ensure health insurance plans cover mental health benefits.||Ensure health insurance plans cover victims of rape & molestation.|
The copy of the above proposed steps has been sent to the Prime Minister’s Office. Since Manmohan Singh has exhausted his quota of speaking for the month of January, we can expect a reply on this matter only in March since the Prime Minister would have exhausted his quota for February as well, speaking about the LoC infiltrations by Pakistan.
Like the National Rifle Association, who have launched strong protest to Obama’s Gun Control laws, in India the National Rappers Association led by none other than Yo Yo Honey Singh has criticized the proposed law saying that rappers like him use their Libido to make music and that a 10 minute Libido limit is too less to come up with the kind of lyrics that he has been writing so far.
Various Communist Parties of India are holding a protest march demanding the Prime Minister not to get inspired by the imperial United States and have alleged that the Activists who proposed the Libido control measures are US agents acting at the behest of their handlers in Washington D.C.
Dismissing the Communist Party’s allegations as mere ‘Mao Mao’ noise, the Activists said that they are eagerly waiting for the month of March for a reply by the Prime Minister.