Monday, 23rd October, 2017

Man’s citizenship revoked after he fails to tweet anything about FIFA world cup

16, Jul 2014 By Awadhi 66A

In a move that has left tongues wagging and tails talking, The Government of India has revoked the citizenship of an Indian national citing his inactivity on social media regarding recently concluded FIFA World Cup. The Press information Bureau in his statement clarified the extreme step. The spokesperson of GOI confirmed that the order came from the highest echelons of power.

In the statement it was cited that Mr. A.A. Kaputra not only observed a studied silence for the entire period of the football extravaganza but also some of his tweets and shares seem to be what only can be termed as mockery of the Football Fans of this great nation. He failed to show appropriate anger/enthusiasm even when Mr. Suarez bit another player  and he even remained passive when our close ally Brazil was bested by our close ally and traditionally peaceful, ethnically diverse nation of Germany. The Ministry of Home affairs with understanding to his native state has come to conclusion that Mr. Kaputra is a threat to the peace loving society of India and the equality and harmony of Indian people and thereby The Indian Government revoked his citizenship effective immediately. As a evidence of the charges levelled against Mr. Kaputra GOI presented this FB status as evidence of his heretical behaviour.

“A close reading of Shastras and Manu Smriti reveals that even if you do not consider Messi God and Suarez the Son of Satan, you still are as much eligible for heaven as the next guy..or even more so’.’

 Spokesperson further added that he also clearly went against the fundamental duties enshrined in the Indian constitution expected of a citizen, Specifically, “ to promote harmony and the spirit of common brotherhood amongst all the people of India transcending religious, linguistic and regional or sectional diversities; to renounce practices derogatory to the dignity of women.”

When pointed out that India was not part of the World cup, Spokesperson uttered the word ‘irrelevant’.

Meanwhile, cutting across party spectrum Leaders have welcomed the decision and hailed it as milestone in upholding the secularism of Indian Union. AAP supreme leader Arvind kejriwal said that the government should have been more severe towards anti-social elements such as Mr. Kaputra and pointed out that in his 49 days of glorious rule no such thing happened. When pointed out that there was no world cup during his tenure he signed off yelling ‘sab mile huye hain, yahi to sazish hai ambani agents ki.

 In a rare gesture, SP supremo Mulayam singh Yadav welcomed the decision adding that as long as Mr. kaputra does not belong to minority community he should be dealt with utmost severity.

Topics:#Football #India