New Delhi: Ramesh Jain, a middle aged man got the shock of his life today when he saw his wife walking out of a shopping mall empty-handed. According to sources, Mr. Ramesh almost fell of the stairs he was sitting on when he saw his wife walking out of the mall with absolutely nothing in her hands.
“It wasn’t normal, it was shocking to me as well. I’ve never seen a woman getting out of the mall empty-handed in the past 5 years. Watching a woman walking out of this giant mall without buying anything is like watching an Irish guy sipping masala tea in a bar,” a retail shop owner who offered water to Ramesh told Faking News.
“I also advised him to seek urgent medical advice as he was in state of shock when the incident took place,” the shop owner added.
Ramesh’s wife Nikita Jain was immediately detained by the mall’s security guards for her suspicious behaviour when she was rushing through the main gate.
“We figured she was up to something prejudicial when we noticed that she was empty-handed. It was our job to question her,” said the security guard who was on duty at that time.
Although they let her go after Mr. Ramesh interfered and convinced them that she went inside the mall just to use the toilet.
Mrs. Jain was urgently admitted to a nearby hospital where the Doctor reckoned that she was suffering from a rare and very unusual disease called “Husbandophobia” in which the female patient wants to buy everything but her mind can’t stop thinking about her broke husband which stops her from purchasing useless things.
“Next, she might starts spending most of her time in the kitchen instead of the dressing room,” the doctor warned.
“Last night, when I came home from work, she served me a cup of tea without even begging for it. At that very moment I knew that she was setting up the plot for a trip to the shopping centre,” Ramesh told Faking News.
When asked about why he wasn’t inside the mall with his wife Mr. Ramesh Said, “I was in there with her but she infuriated me and I came out of the mall.”
“As you know, women try something and then they try another 200 things and then they buy the first thing they tried. Today, she went overboard when after squeezing (women’s way of checking whether the bread is good or not) almost 100 loaves of bread she decided to purchase the tasteless sugar free cookies. The attendant was staring at us as if we were aliens wearing banana leaves. It embarrassed me badly, so, I came out,” Ramesh further added.
“This wasn’t the first time she embarrassed me. Last time when we were here, first, she made me hold the bags then she made me hold the kids and then she made me hold her purse as well and when I told her that I needed to pee she told me to hold that too,” furious Ramesh went on to add.
“I am glad she has Husbandophobia. It’s not a disease it is actually a boon for all the married men,” he said.