Few days before on 5th June, Maharashtra Dy CM and FM, Ajit dada Pawar presented a stunning budget in assembly. All were so stunned including CM and other ministers that security started searching for stun gun in assembly.
But since Maharashtra assembly is not as suave as our parliament where pepper sprays are routinely used, nothing was found. The security chief was grumbling that he had to do some work, after so many years!
The stunning budget has earmarked whopping 11 percent for development works. Yes.. 11 %. Mind blowing, isn’t it? And for salaries and pensions of its own staff , measly 48%. How frugal and mean one can get to its own employee!
We caught hold of some ministers from both parties, ruling and opposition, within the ruling alliance. Ministers, though stunned, were sure that Dada has done the right thing.
“You see, as being the most developed state, we hardly need more development. Dada has bigger ambitions on national level. Some day becoming PM and making his uncle retire to Rashtrapati Bhawan”.
“Retire!!!?” we were shocked to hear that. “ I mean , elevate to that great position in Indian democracy”.. the minister ran, taking his foot in the mouth, somewhat.
When we saw one more of his colleague from NCP , we barged ahead and asked, “What is this talk of Dada’s PM aspirations and no need of development? We cant see any connection”. The minister was looking at me as if I am some dim wit. “Arre, can’t you see? The disparity in wealth of different states, is against national integration and Dada is trying his best to bridge that gap. As we are already quite rich state, why bother to go ahead? Rather we walk a bit back towards our less developed brother states like Bihar?”
“Hmmm…”, not knowing what to say!
“Dont say just hmmm… cant you see there is more to it than this. When all are equally ‘progressed’ then those politicians from North will not monopolize the PMO. ‘ The minister went with a smirk on his face.
We were trying to understand this ‘depth’ of thinking when we caught hold of CM himself! Mr. Prithiraj Chavan, who like his namesake from history, was brave and poised in his smile after this ‘attack’ by his own Dy CM.
“First let me congratulate my Dy for these smart moves.”
“ Which smart moves, Sir?” Faking news was now on very shaky ground while asking questions, unsure of what will come next.
“ Dada has outsmarted the upstart CM candidate Raj Thakrey”. What!!!.. we just expressed with our eyes.
“ Since we will be as progressive as UP and Bihar then our non voters… I mean our guests from those states, will not see any need to travel so far in search of work as they will have none! As we will slow down development, in larger national intrest of unity and equality, bhaiyyas, I mean brothers there,will be staying put in whatever development is there, in their states. Then there will be no poll plank against north Indians. See this is so intelligent no?” CM was indeed brave!
Hesitantly, Faking news asked and what about the 60% budget for salaries and pensions and loan repayment?
“Shouldn’t we repay? If we default, how next govt will be able to borrow for their grand plans of national integration etc?. How will they pay for staff? And as far as staff salaries are concerned, that is very important. As our new PM keeps harping on less Govt, we are showing him what real govt does. Charity!” What he is talking!!!! , now our reporters were just miming, as speaking was beyond their ability now.
But CM was kind to explain. “ See we employ too many people. That is first act of charity. Unrequired staff and unrequited positions in not so required departments, gives employment to so many people. And all the most inefficient and lazy people find shelter in our employment. The efficient nerds can get jobs in heartless private sector or IT. But who will look after the leftover poor souls apart from us? This is the job of Govt. And pensions are obligatory when we pamper them all their life. VRS in Maharashtra is only for failed poll candidates and ex ministers like Sushilkumar Shinde saheb. In short, Maharashtra govt is most kind and compassionate govt in India.” and CM was walking dazed ahead by too much use of his brains. Bad days are here for him now.
And then we saw Ajit dada himself, who was actually walking like a ‘dada’ in his gully.
“Sir, why so much for your own staff and so less for development and farmers?” “What less? If we start development projects, you people crib about small sums going aside. BADE BADE STATE ME AISI CHOTI CHOTI MISAPPROPRIATIONS HOTI RAHATI HAI. But you press people never understand. So we decided to take a bigger national picture.”
“Yes, we heard that, equality and all’
“Don’t dare to cut me in. Else I will cut your power supply, water supply, urine supply… etc. As far as farmers are concerned, God shows us the way. If he doesn’t give proper timely rains, he wishes to punish farmers, for wrong voting. Who are we to come in between?”
“And if it rains are correct…” we were shaking deep inside questioning the Dada himself…
“Well, if it rains properly, why they require help?”… he walked away laughing.
And our team stood stunned.