Sunday, 18th February, 2018

Kejriwal exposes the fact that no one listens in Corporate meetings

01, Nov 2012 By gireesh

In a startling revelation, Arvind Kejriwal today submitted proof to Faking News that no one listens to anyone in corporate meetings throughout India.

This has created quite an uproar throughout corporate India and folks ranging from big business houses to IIT grads-waiting-for-their-CAT results have reacted strongly to this.

“We don’t need kejriwal for this, we have known this information for years now, infact, this has been the most rewarded skill”, said Mr. Stephen Covey, head of HR operations, India Inc.

“If you think about it, we spend half the time in our online meetings, trying to make sure that the mikes are working and everyone can hear everyone else. It is a totally different point that, we just hear and do not listen” , said Ramesh Surendranathan,transition specialist in India’s leading software company.

I once shouted “Boobs” in the middle of a meeting, and to my utter dismay, there was a person, who said, “I agree, but the meta-point, I am trying to make is actually…”. I did not know what the protocol was, when everyone else in the room nodded their head in approval, so I just opened my laptop and ‘liked’ Deepika Padukone’s FB page. What else do you expect a reasonable man to do? said “Anonymous” ( Since we respect the privacy of our sources, we are not disclosing his name)

The whole universe is a manifestation of the metaphysical reality that the human mind can perceive deep within. Meetings are an extension of that reality and one needs to realise this at a subconscious level to channel the cosmic power to guide us, chimed in the legendary Deepak Chopra.

We are trained to do this at home, where moms don’t  pay heed to cogent arguments on why playing cricket is better than going to the IITs. E.g., look at where Dhoni is today and where is Mr.Kejriwal. This just continues in the GD training that we get before B-School interviews, and continues during our course. By the time we enter Corporate India, we are trained to tune out any voice disturbing our dissertation of paradigm shifting strategic initiatives which will change the ball game, said Shyam Raghuvanshram, who is a management consultant, fittingly, in the Natural Gas sector.

Surprisingly both the national parties refused to comment  on this. But the word on the street is that, this is about the politics of business whereas, the political parties are in the business of politics, hence they see the point is orthogonal to their ‘profession’

Next week, for all we know, the expose might be that the Sun rises in Japan before it does so in India.