A world class institute in our country has been recently facing a severe MEMOry crisis. Recent statistics depict a steep rise in the distribution of memos to students as a part of the “scholarship” program. Earlier, the institute followed the lucky-draw system policy, but had to take groundbreaking actions to accommodate as many students as possible under their scholarship program.
Professor Ipphoo (name changed to protect the identity) claims that, “Iffu(if you) try to measure the slope of the memo-distribution curve using a kampooter pogram, you bheel encounter a fatal memo overflow error.” When he tried overriding the error, the result was an endless memo-loop. Some programming enthusiasts have taken this up as their final year project and are working on it day and night to find a solution.
Following the general trend, students protested against this memo-hike on Facebook. Personality experts identified three categories of protesters. Following is the classification and the best slogans from each subdivision.
- The Happy Ones: These people had wanted to get a memo their entire life and finally when the new policy came in action, they were the first few to update their status. The best ones were: “Didn’t take bath for a week.. #gotAmemo.” -Bittu Anil, “Lost the strap of my ID card…but #gotAmemo.” -Ranjan Chandra.
- The Sad Ones: They were one of the few students who were not so lucky this time. They expressed their deep sadness at not receiving a memo. The saddest ones were: “Stayed in the institute for 3 years….still #didnotgetAmemo.” -Sindur Paliwal, “Reached 150th level in Candy Crush… but #didnotgetAmemo.” -Bisu Vardaan.
- The Confused Crowd: As a result of mass distribution of memos, many are still confused whether they have been allotted a memo or not. They too turned to Facebook for expressing their confusion. The most confused one was: “Schrodinger’s cat #gotAmemo and #didnotgetAmemo.” -Maggi.
While the online protests were going on, the offline crowd was seen outside the Admin block raising slogans like “Abki baar Memo-di Sarkar!”, “Memo Go Back!!”, “Tum mujhe respect do, mai tumhe Memo dunga.”, and many more. This incident has marked the beginning of the “Quit Memo” movement, and this day shall be comMEMOrated as “Memo Day” in the history of this institute.
The higher-ups claim that no such policy decisions have been undertaken by the institute in this regard and refused to entertain further queries. Only time will tell when this dispute will be resolved. Till then.. #getAmemo!