Saturday, 24th February, 2018

Inspired by Kejriwal, Delhi says no to ‘Lal Batti’ at traffic signals too

30, Dec 2013 By Shaitaan Khopdi ™

28th Dec, Ramlila Maidan, Delhi:  At the stroke of the noon hour when babus burnt up secret files; Delhi will awake to life without ‘Lal Batti’ announced Delhi’s new CM in his speech touted as Delhi’s Tryst with Destiny.

VIP culture.

As Kejriwal announced total boycott of ‘Lal Batti’ by his ministers at the swearing in ceremony, Dilliwalas who are known for their love for anything related to swearing lapped up to the idea.

Within hours Delhi completely stopped following traffic red lights. As a result traffic became total chaos. Probably Kejriwal had anticipated this situation that’s why he and his ministers did not bring their personal vehicles for swearing in ceremony and used Delhi Metro to commute.

Amid this entire chaos traffic policemen were completely clueless as how to control the situation. They stopped a car and asked driver to cough up Rs 100/- for traffic violation. Driver paid up bribe and then started called the corruption hotline announced by Kejriwal.

The cop fell on driver’s feet and begged not to complain as he feared losing his job. Car driver cut the call when traffic cop promised to pay 500. ‘Long live Kejriwal’ shouted the car driver and left the scene. Taking lesson from the incident, another cop stationed at ‘Moolchand Chauraha’ decided to write a challan for traffic light violations. Even after searching for 2 hours he could not find the challan book so he set the man free reluctantly.

Shaitaan Khopdi™ tried to gather reactions from people across all walk of life about the latest development:

Narendra Modi: It’s a sign that no ‘Lal Batti’ can stop me from waving Tiranga on ‘Lal Kila’.

Sagarika Ghose: I would ask them to get rid of Saffron Orange light as well. Please watch my show FTN tonight as we discuss “Should we use only secular colored traffic lights”.

Dhoni: Well of courseI always get confused between Traffic Red Light and Red Light Area. So I am happy that one of them is going away.

Virat Kohli: Ask any third umpire, I hated #$^*@%& red lights while batting.

Javed Akhtar:

Zindagi ki Laal Batti ko tod rahe ho to zinda ho tum,

Tarakki ke ‘Haath’ se Kamyabi ki ‘Jhaadu’ fer rahe ho to zinda ho tum.

Har bribe ko corruption helpline pe report karna seekho,

Anna Hazare ki tarah apna haq lena seekho.

Har ek sarkari office bulaye tumko khole apni baahein,

Har baabu ke kaam me tezi dekhe ye nigaahein.

Jo Aam Aadmi ke jaise aage badh rahe ho to zinda ho tum.