The government today revoked its order that had asked all central government employees to communicate only in Hindi. The decision was taken after a cabinet meeting convened to assess the outcome of the order during the past two weeks.
Motivated by the government’s incentive of Rs. 2000, employees spared no time to post official communications across government gazettes and social media in Hindi. “Going ahead with this offer would cost the exchequer about Rs.2.2 billion a year even if we want to pay 50 paise per tweet or facebook message and 1 Rupee per official letter,” the spokesperson of the Hindi Resources Development ministry said.
Google India CEO admitted that their Hindi transliteration services were overloaded as people unfamiliar with Hindi typewriting frantically used the service to type letters and notices in Hindi. Confusion prevailed at the office of External Affairs ministry after some Secretary-level officials stuck to the Hindi rule and insisted that the visiting Chinese officials speak only in Hindi.
Delhi witnessed some communal tensions as beggars from other states protested the biased behavior of commuters who gave alms only to those who begged in Hindi. Police had to cordon off the residence of Social Welfare minister who was let to leave his home only after promising equal begging rights to everyone.
Blaming the anti-Hindi political parties for the issue, the minister of Commerce argued that non-compliance to the Hindi rule is the reason for hoarding of food grains and vegetables. “When our department officers raid the suspected hoarding places, the wrapped goods have wrong labels in English and other languages, making it difficult to prove the offence, as IPC section 161 requires an explicit proof to book a person for hoarding” she explained.
Regional Doordharshan kendras retained their nostalgic ‘Over to Delhi’, this time with a twist, refining it to ‘Over to Hindi’. “We are an organization controlled by the central government. So we are obliged to comply with the rule regarding our communication with the viewers,” the General Manager of DD clarified. A private news channel showed Hindi subtitles which turned out to be a mess when all 15 of the participants talked at the same time in 17 different languages.
In several non-Hindi speaking states, officers were seen hunting for ‘Learn Hindi in 30 minutes’ series of books and DVDs. Many Hindi school teachers have quit their job to offer Hindi tuitions for Babus. Our South India correspondent reports that ‘Ek Gaav me ek kisaan rahtha thaa’ has become a cliche phrase once again.
Perhaps the biggest headache for the government was the bad Hindi spelling and grammar used by the employees. A number of jokes on misspelled Hindi words have been doing the rounds on social media. “It was like deciphering an unknown script,” one senior official was quoted as saying after he left his job fed up with correcting spelling mistakes in letters written by his subordinates.
A leading satirist commented that now it really looks like the Hindi alphabet has hung itself underneath the horizontal line of errors.