Friday, 17th November, 2017

Engineering curriculum to consist only of CAT coaching and software coding

22, Jan 2014 By Tanuj Khosla

In a landmark decision All India Council for Technical Education (AICTE) today announced drastic changes to the curriculum taught in engineering colleges across the country.

Students celebrating.
Students celebrating the good news.

Beginning immediately, the entire syllabus shall be divided only into two parts – CAT coaching and software coding both of which shall be taught simultaneously over the four years of the course.

The decision has received appreciation from various quarters across the country.

“I applaud this forward looking and practical move by AICTE,” said Mr. Chaman Chaddha, the Head of HR at software firm Infosys, “The students that we hire on-campus from engineering colleges are so poor in quality that we have been making our hiring decision based on the following three criteria (a) presence of all eight fingers in the hands other than the thumbs (b) ability to switch on and off a computer (c) no history of spinal injuries so that the person can sit at one place for long hours. With this decision they shall have some grounding in coding and consequently we can save substantially on our training expenses which can then be used to have better manicured gardens in all our campuses.”

Added an ecstatic Mr. Chatur Hardik, a Civil Engineering student at Aam Aadmi College of Engineering, “This is an amazing announcement. I feel like kissing the forehead of the Chairman of AICTE. Most of us start preparing for CAT after second year of engineering. If we don’t clear it in our first attempt, we end up taking a job at a software firm and then try again. This decision saves us the money that we spend on CAT coaching. We can now use the same to buy better quality booze!! I shall now have scotch whiskey at least two times in a semester, the second time being the day the exams end. AICTE rocks!!”

Faking News caught up with Tanuj Khosla, its in-house expert on such issues. “This is an excellent decision and shall have widespread social implications.” said Tanuj while using fork and knife to eat his ice-cream scoop.

“Earlier there was this huge class divide between Mechanical and Computer engineers. The former were considered to be cooler while the latter were branded as mazdoors. Girls neither enrolled in Mechanical Engineering nor dated Mechanical Engineers. The situation was so bad in my college that after three years they converted the girl’s toilet in the Mechanical Engineering department to a shop floor and placed a huge Lathe machine in there. This ruling by AICTE shall put all engineers at par with each other as now everybody shall study the same stuff. Finally Mechanical Engineers shall know that a date can mean things other than just a fruit. Kudos to AICTE.”