Thursday, 22nd February, 2018

Delhi woman finds safety in Aadhaar

03, May 2017 By MalluNinja

Gurugram: A woman who identifies as a woman recently has found solace and protection in Aadhar card. The woman who works in Gurugram has benefited greatly from a minor technical error from the Aadhaar department. The woman who had been forced to apply for an Aadhaar card, reluctantly applied for one. She had been denied the ladies seat on the bus as her Aadhar card was not linked to the seat. This forced her to apply for an Aadhaar card. Her reluctant application and ensuing technical error has turned into a good fortune for which she is thankful.

During the application she had identified herself as a woman even though she had been identifying herself as an apache helicopter for a brief period. When she received the Aadhaar card, she noticed that she had been marked as a cow. Considering the general usage of the term ‘cow’ with reference to women, she was initially offended and was contemplating joining Zumba sessions or running 10k marathons with Milind Soman. Upon enquiry she was informed that there was a mishap at the Aadhaar registration and she was issued the Aadhaar card and number which was to be issued to a jersey cow by the same name. As a result of this mishap, she has found it easier to commute to and from work in Gurugram. This has been made possible by ‘Cow-Protectors’ who have mistaken her for an actual cow based on Aadhaar registration.

She has confirmed that she has been able to walk in Gurugram and Delhi during late hours without any fear. Prior to receiving the Aadhaar, she had been stalked and harassed by men and other animals. After receiving the Aadhaar, she has always been surrounded by ‘Cow-Protectors’ and as a result feels very safe. She has found crossing roads and entering temples also to be fairly easy. As for the cow, it has been facing a serious identity crisis. While the cow relishes the opportunity to vote, it was quite hassled by the looks it was receiving from all the sheep who had lined up at the voting booths. While AAP spokespersons accused her with tampering of voting machines, when our correspondent tried reaching out to the cow, she decided to move on by stating that her opinion was just a ‘moo-point’.